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HOW DID JESUS' PARENTS BECOME A COUPLE? HERE’S WHAT BIBLICAL SCHOLARS SAY.

The story of Jesus's birth is oft told, but Mary and Joseph's unconventional
courtship can also be found in the history of ancient Palestine.

“The Nativity at Night” by Guido Reni, an Italian baroque painter.
Painting via Art Images, Getty Images
ByDaniel S. Levy
Published December 20, 2022
• 10 min read
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In the New Testament, the Gospels tell the story of Jesus’ birth—the first
Christmas. Set during the rise of the Roman Empire, the stories create a radiant
image of a young couple giving birth to the son of God in Bethlehem. The
Christian world has embraced the faithful story of Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus
for centuries. Yet, in those times—even without getting into the plausibility of
a virgin birth—their situation would have been considered scandalous. Becoming
pregnant out of wedlock was a crime punishable by death.

So how did this disreputable situation turn into a cornerstone of Christianity
celebrated with tidings of comfort and joy to this day? That’s a question that’s
been asked for 2,000 years. Here’s what some biblical scholars claim.

The faithful flock to Apparition Hill in Medjugorje, Bosnia, where Mary was said
to have appeared in 1981.
Photograph by Diana Markosian, Nat Geo Image Collection
Please be respectful of copyright. Unauthorized use is prohibited.



BETROTHAL

The historical documentation for Mary comes from the Gospels of Matthew and
Luke, written roughly between A.D. 70 and 110.  Mary, believed to have been
quite beautiful, was born to Anne and Joachim in Nazareth. She would have had
Middle Eastern features, with dark hair and eyes and spoken an Aramaic patois.

She would have married young, as all girls did at the time since most people did
not live more than a few decades.

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An 18th-century painting on cloth of Mary and Jesus at the Addis Ababa Museum.
An 18th-century painting on cloth of Mary and Jesus at the Addis Ababa Museum.
Painting via Werner Forman Archive, Bridgeman Images


“There is no luxury called adolescence in that world,” noted Byron McCane, a
historian at Florida Atlantic University. “As soon as young men and women show
they are capable of reproducing, they get married and start to have children.”

Families arranged these unions, and it is possible that in such as place as
Nazareth, which had only a few hundred people, Mary would have known Joseph. In
the tradition of ancient Jewish people, Mary and Joseph became betrothed, the
first part of a two-stage Jewish wedding ceremony. 

For the initial part, called the erusin, Joseph would give a mohar, a dowry, to
Mary’s family. At that point, he and Mary were legally wed. Yet by tradition,
while they were married, the wife continued to live with her parents for about a
year after the betrothal. During that time, Mary and Joseph would look forward
to a missuin, a wedding ceremony, after which she would move out of her parents’
home.

Raphael’s High Renaissance take on the betrothal of Mary and Joseph from 1504
Painting by Raphael (Raffaello Sanzio of Urbino, 1483-1520), Pinacoteca di
Brera, Milan, Italy/Bridgeman Images
Please be respectful of copyright. Unauthorized use is prohibited.



THE ANNUNCIATION

But following the erusin, while she was still living with her parents, Mary
became pregnant. There is no hard proof about how this happened, but according
to the Book of Luke, one of two Gospels that describe the birth of Jesus in the
New Testament, the angel Gabriel appeared to the teenager, informing her she had
been chosen by God: “And he came to her and said, ‘Greetings, favored one! And
now, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you will name him
Jesus’” (Luke 1:28).

This news confused the young woman, who had no idea how this could be, since she
had not had relations with Joseph. According to Luke, Gabriel explained that
although she was still a virgin, a transcendent event would occur. “The holy
Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you,”
he said, and “therefore the child to be born will be called holy; . . . the Son
of God” (Luke 1:35).

According to the Book of Matthew, when Joseph learned of his betrothed’s
pregnancy, he was not happy. Observing the Bible’s commandments and, hoping not
to cause Mary any embarrassment, he sought to quietly end the erusin. As he
thought about how he would do this, he fell asleep. According to the Book of
Matthew, an angel appeared in his dream, telling him, “do not be afraid to take
Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit”
(Matthew 1:20). When Joseph awoke, he understood Mary had been faithful, and
they went through with the nissuin, taking “his wife into his home.”

The Angel Gabriel appearing to Mary, and hailing her as the “favored one!” by
Italian painter Filippo Lippi (c.1406-69) (and workshop)  
Painting by Filippo Lippi via Bridgeman Images
Please be respectful of copyright. Unauthorized use is prohibited.



PREGNANCY’S IMPLICATIONS

Angelic vision or not, being pregnant outside marriage could be a dangerous
thing. “Once you are betrothed, it is considered adultery,” said Carol Meyers, a
professor of religion at Duke University. Despite the biblical edict mandating
that when “a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the adulterer
and the adulteress shall be put to death,” stoning was not always carried out.

Even so, Mary’s pregnancy would be looked down upon by the community, and it
could also visit shame on her family. Nazareth was a small place, and neighbors
not only knew each other’s business but had long communal memories. There were
also important social and familial implications for Mary and Joseph. Theirs was
a kinship-based society, and a person’s identity was established through the
father’s line, as laid out in the first chapter of the Book of Matthew, which
details the male lineage of Jesus’ family starting with the patriarch Abraham.

“They wanted to know that all of those children were of that father,” noted
McCane, “because he has to support them.”


WHO WAS JOSEPH?

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Mary, Joseph, and Jesus fled to Egypt to avoid Herod’s murderous wrath.
Painting by Murillo Bartolomé Esteban via Adolfo Bezzi/Electa/Mondadori
Portfolio via Getty
While Joseph could claim royal descent, the Books of Matthew and Mark both refer
to him as a carpenter. Yet the Greek word that Mark used is tektõn and its
meaning is closer to the Aramaic word naggara, which means a worker or
journeyman. Most of Jesus’ parables refer to agriculture, so it is likely that
Joseph farmed, with carpentry, which he taught Jesus, as a sideline. He might
have even done some work at the nearby city of Sepphoris, a spot that the Jewish
historian Flavius Josephus called “the Jewel of Galilee,” which was being
rebuilt at the time by Herod Antipas.



TAX BURDEN

The ancient Jewish population was obliged to pay taxes to Rome and to King
Herod, as well as to tithe of their harvest to the Temple. As it was a census
year, the expectant couple, according to the Books of Matthew and Luke, headed
to Bethlehem to pay what had been mandated by Caesar Augustus. The trip would
take Mary and Joseph about a week to travel from Nazareth, and they probably
made their way south along a route where they could stop at springs to rest and
find shelter in small towns.

A 14th-century triptych by Duccio di Buoninsegna shows Jesus at rest in the
manger.
Painting by Duccio di Buoninsegna via Pantheon Studios, Inc.
Please be respectful of copyright. Unauthorized use is prohibited.



THE BIRTH

When the couple arrived in Bethlehem, the Gospels tell us that Mary went into
labor. They needed a place for her to give birth, yet there was no room for them
in the local inn, so they may have taken refuge in a limestone cave used to
corral domesticated animals. Some, however, argue they actually stayed with
family, in a guest room that in a Palestinian home would have been a lower room
where animals were kept. Whatever the case, Mary gave birth to Jesus in
Bethlehem, an event that would be celebrated for thousands of years to come as
Christmas.


CHURCH OF THE NATIVITY

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The Church of the Nativity
Photograph via Pantheon Studios, Inc
Travelers to the West Bank often visit Bethlehem’s Church of the Nativity, which
is believed to mark the site of Jesus’ birth. In the second century, Saint
Justin Martyr identified the cave where Mary gave birth to Jesus. During the
fourth century, Emperor Constantine and his mother had a basilica built there,
which Samaritan rebels destroyed in the sixth century. Emperor Jus­tinian
rebuilt it soon after; inside lay the sacred grotto, the spot of the miraculous
birth marked by an altar with a 14-point silver star embedded in a marble floor.
The site is currently maintained by clergy members of the Roman Catholic,
Armenian Apostolic, and Greek Orthodox Churches.

Portions of this work have previously appeared in The Story of Mary by Daniel S.
Levy. Copyright © 2018 National Geographic Partners, LLC.
To learn more, check out The Story of Mary. Available wherever books and
magazines are sold
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