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5000 lizards in a trench coat
✧ 25 ✧ they/them ✧
Charlie's my name, getting overly attached to fictional characters is my game.
T*rfs Stop Reblogging My Joke Posts And Go Directly To Hell Challenge 2k24
🏳️‍⚧️🙏🔮
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some-pers0n:

> I hate how people will look at popular indie artists who had one or two songs
> go viral on TikTok and start making fun of anybody who listens to them. “Oh
> you listen to Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Jack Stauber, Glass Animals, and Mother
> Mother? Tsk, don’t you know that is stupid TikTok neurodivergent white
> transmasc preteen music? It’s so mid and bad you should listen to real music–”
> you are a pit of misery



Jan.. 07, 2024 19730
# like OK yes we get it you're cooler than everyone... what is this middle
school # Also a lot of these artists are popular bc they're. get this. Good #
You're making fun of people for liking Hozier - what next‚ mocking ppl for
liking a chunky hearty vegetable stew?? # it's a classic for a reason you
insufferable hipster # Am I supposed to decide that one of my favorite meals is
cringe now simply bc teenagers also like it



Every day i realize more and more that the human body is essentially one of
those flash games where the objective is to build a bridge to get the truck to
the other side, and even if your bridge is utter shit and only barely manages to
fling the truck past the finish line before everything falls apart and explodes,
that’s counted as a win. Evolution is a bored middle schooler who punts you past
the age of 25 and then sits back watching your body crumple into a pile of
matchsticks like “LOL! Well, you’re theoretically old enough to have passed on
your genes by now, so my job here is done :o)”



Jan.. 07, 2024 12




mochlus:

> This tiny gray cat showed up in our backyard and we were like oh shes so small
> she must be a little baby kitten, we have to help her, so we got her inside
> and took her to the vet and they were like nope. no she has all her adult
> teeth. shes just small. she’s literally just that small.

This is like the opposite of our cat who we adopted from the shelter and they
were like “Oh ya she just got here, we think she’s about 2 years old” bc she was
already fully cat-sized, and then she proceeded to almost double in volume and
grow an entirely new coat of fur. We think now she must have been about 6-8
months old. She was just a Mega-Baby 😭



Jan.. 06, 2024 3952
# queue


Anonym queried:

Hey it's none of my beeswax, really, but there's a revolutionary new feline
arthritis drug that's impressed the heck out of my vet. One shot a month, no
pills. It's also helping my cat.


Ah no worries, if you mean Solensia then my kitty’s already on it!! She’s been
on it since it first came out a couple of years ago, it definitely did wonders
for her for a while, but unfortunately I think as she’s getting older the
arthritis pain is still showing through, and the vet said increasing the
dose/frequency probably wouldn’t have any more effect… :( But we keep her as
happy and comfy as we can ❤️


Jan.. 05, 2024 5




A while ago I had the opportunity to give a presentation on writing queer
characters in historical fiction, and to a pretty broad audience (i.e. not just
fellow queer people who are already well-versed in history), which was really
fun, and the majority of the questions from the audience at the end were very
cool & respectful, but….

I will never be able to forget. The one person who asked: “It’s said that in the
Neolithic period, there was no war, and men were more interested in studying the
stars than battle. How do you think this affected their relationships with
women?”

…Like. I’m sorry, even putting aside the fact that there definitely WAS
small-scale warfare in Neolithic times, are you………….. are you trying to imply
that ancient Neolithic humans thought studying the stars was kinda fruity? Are
you asking me if Grugina was dissatisfied with her proto-marriage to Grug
because he was a limp-wristed beta cuck who’d never spilt fresh human blood? Is
this what you’re asking me? Me, the limp-wristed spirit of a consumptive
Victorian boy reborn into the body of a goth-lite lesbian who’s just spent the
past hour telling you about nineteenth-century sexology? You thought I would
have a lot to say on the topic of Neolithic heterosexual relationship drama?



Jan.. 05, 2024 33




iosonomer-blog:

> 😻😻😻😻



Jan.. 04, 2024 14338




narcissistcookbook:

> this is a targeted attack on like 23 different people i know



Jan.. 04, 2024 16438
# HEY # AND WHAT OF IT???? # Remembering the part in OHP where I mentioned
'Penelope weaving by day and unweaving by night' # And my editor was like 'You
gotta clarify this for people who don't know who Penelope is' # And I was like
'There are people who don't know Penelope?? Penelope weaving by day and
unweaving by night??? Come on' # 'Everyone knows the Odyssey??? Surely???' # So
I asked around and everyone was like 'What the hell are you talking about' #
Turns out my experiences are not universal



fluent-bilingual:

> architeuthisducks-blog:
> 
> > Me Giving a Pressed Conference: our advocacy for the disabled must include
> > the addict, the imperfect victim, those we despise; the right to autonomy
> > and life cannot devolve into a popularity contest
> > 
> > Reporter I Hate (Not Sexual Tension): Does that include all the attendees of
> > the Bored Ape NFT event who went blind
> > 
> > Me: *Blood streaming from my nostrils and eyes* david, it includes everyone



Jan.. 03, 2024 48669



solunestia queried:

I love the beast so much omg! She reminded me of my beast, old man Tiger.




Tiger lived to be 19. I had to set up a couple boxes next to my bed (that was
already just a box spring and mattress directly on the floor) so he could climb
up them like stairs. He was mostly deaf, so you could accidentally sneak up on
him, but he was never mad he just had to let you know about it. One of the few
things he could still hear was my mom hollering at her sportsball game - he'd
always check on her when she did that. His baby toe beans would get cold, so he
would politely insist on being held. (This is what he's doing in the second
one.) I got him a sweater to help him stay warm, which he actually seemed to
like.



Thanks for reminding me how great old kitties are. 💜


Oh my goodness, what a good boy!!!!! 😭❤️ I can’t believe you got him in a
sweater omg, that’s absolutaly adorable!!! My old lady gets cold too but alas,
would never suffer the indignity of a sweater, so we got her a little heatpad
instead which she basically never leaves 😅 TYSM for these pics, I’m so glad
your old man got to spend his retirement in such a loving and cozy home ❤️ May
all old kitties enjoy such luxury!


Jan.. 03, 2024 21




bumblebeebats:

> bumblebeebats:
> 
> > So my mum works at a nonprofit that reduces food waste by redistributing
> > whatever random stuff grocery stores don’t want, and apparently today they
> > got CASES AND CASES of… these.
> > 
> > 
> > 
> > Apparently she put out a plate for people to try and the *maximum* score
> > that anyone gave it (out of dozens of people) was a 5/10.
> > 
> > But like. i HAVE to try them. And you know what, I was skeptical of the
> > “turkey & stuffing” flavour tortilla chips she brought home last year but
> > they turned out to be delicious, so.
> 
> Alright, so. The packet is open. First impressions: the smell is…………not good.
> It’s like I’m smelling a regular packet of crisps while someone is burning an
> overly sweet Christmas Spice candle right next to me.
> 
> Next comes the tasting. I am. filled with dread

Hmm. So. God is dead. God remains dead, and Walkers Crisps has killed him.

It’s not necessarily like, the worst crisp I’ve ever tasted, simply bc I
personally hate all cheesy or BBQ flavours with a passion, it’s just……….. so
utterly devoid of joy. It kind of tasted a little bit like a cinnamon-spiced
apple chip, and a little like a regular potato chip, both of which are good
things, but somehow by attempting to straddle the two it fell down a dimensional
hole in the middle and ended up in the flavourless void between the stars. It
was somehow both not sweet enough and not salty enough and also too much of both
at once. The notes of nutmeg and clove were atrocious. I can still taste it in
my teeth, and each time I do I feel like I’ve taken another -1hp damage.


0.5/10, A CHILLING REMINDER OF MAN’S HUBRIS



Jan.. 03, 2024 386