www.theonion.com
Open in
urlscan Pro
151.101.130.166
Public Scan
URL:
https://www.theonion.com/
Submission: On August 30 via manual from US — Scanned from DE
Submission: On August 30 via manual from US — Scanned from DE
Form analysis 0 forms found in the DOM
Text Content
* The Onion * * The A.V. Club * Deadspin * Gizmodo * Jalopnik * Jezebel * Kotaku * Quartz * The Root * The Takeout * * The Inventory America's Finest News Source. Send us a tip!ShopSubscribe HomeLatestNewsOnion UniversityOpinionLocalPoliticsEntertainmentSportsVideo America's Finest News Source. HomeLatestNewsOnion UniversityOpinionLocalPoliticsEntertainmentSportsVideo Opinion PARENTS EXPLAIN WHY GENDER-AFFIRMING CARE FOR KIDS IS JUST A FAD After a number of high profile individuals claimed that transgender youth are too immature to make such a decision about their identity, The Onion asked parents to explain why gender-affirming care for kids is just a fad, and this is what they said. Breaking News HISTORIAN EXPLAINS THAT PEPE THE FROG WAS ORIGINALLY A HINDU SYMBOL Local IDIOT KID DIES AFTER BEING LEFT IN UNLOCKED CAR PARKERSVILLE, MI—After conducting an investigation that concluded he must have been a certified dipshit, authorities confirmed local idiot kid Dylan Zwillet, 6, died Wednesday after being left in an unlocked car. “It’s always a tragedy when a child… Breaking News MEDITERRANEAN TOURISTS GO ON INCREDIBLE REFUGEE-WATCHING TOUR MYKONOS, GREECE—Describing it as a truly awe-inspiring sight of natural beauty, tourists told reporters Wednesday about the incredible refugee-watching tour they recently enjoyed during their trip to the Mediterranean. “At first, the guide said we… Breaking News NEW U.S. ARMY RECRUITMENT AD TOUTS MILITARY AS GREAT ALTERNATIVE TO STARVING ON STREETS WASHINGTON—In an effort to reach Americans affected by growing income inequality and the soaring cost of food, the U.S. Army launched a new ad campaign this week that touts the military as a great alternative to starving on the streets. “Food,… Opinion CONVICTED FELONS GIVE TRUMP ADVICE FOR GOING TO PRISON Local PARENTS DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW SON COULD SPEND SO MUCH MONEY TO LIVE IN PLACE THAT BRINGS HIM JOY Local URGE TO KILL CHILDREN LINGERS ON MUCH TOO LONG TO BE POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION WATCH Archaeologists Uncover Living Guy By Mistake CC Share Subtitles * Off * English Share this Video FacebookTwitterEmail RedditLink Archaeologists Uncover Living Guy By Mistake Worst Mistakes All Brides Make On Their Wedding Day 00:27 Now playing Texas Launches Outreach Program To Provide Troubled Teens With Assault Rifles 00:35 Now playing Marvel Not Even Bothering To Replace Green Screens With CGI Anymore 00:47 Now playing Report: Your Friends Do Impressions Of You Behind Your Back 00:40 Now playing CHECK THESE OUT Cartoons WRONG JOHN SILVER News In Photos CLICKING ‘OUR BOARD MEMBERS’ LINK BRINGS UP WHOLE SPREAD OF SHIT-EATING GRINS News In Photos LENGTH OF MAN’S FACIAL HAIR DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL TO HOW MUCH FRIENDS, FAMILY SHOULD BE WORRIED Opinion REPUBLICANS REVEAL WHAT THEY WOULD DO IF THEIR KID CAME OUT AS GAY American Voices STUDY FINDS PAPER STRAWS CONTAIN TOXIC ‘FOREVER CHEMICALS’ Opinion WHITE EVANGELICALS EXPLAIN WHY THEY REFUSE TO VOTE FOR VIVEK RAMASWAMY MORE Opinion CHRISTIANS EXPLAIN WHY THEY PUSH CHRISTIANITY IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS Breaking News KNIFE-WIELDING DOCTORS ROAM COUNTRY SEARCHING FOR TEENS TO FORCE TO BE TRANS Local HR REMINDS STAFF DOCTOR’S NOTE REQUIRED TO USE BATHROOM Breaking News RICHARD SACKLER PAYS $1.5 BILLION TO RENAME ALL PICASSO’S WORKS AFTER HIMSELF LOCAL Show all Local NERD WHO SPENT SUMMER GETTING INTO SHAPE QUICKLY DISCOVERS BULLY WORKED OUT TWICE AS HARD BELLINGHAM, WA—Admitting that his physical transformation didn’t even come close to cutting it, local nerd Hayden Gardner told reporters Monday he had spent all summer getting into shape only to discover his bully had worked out twice as hard. “Wow,… Local COP ANNOYED AT ASSUMPTION THAT ALL POLICE OFFICERS ARE AS BAD AS HIM Local DOCTORS ALARMED AFTER EARLY TESTS SUGGEST THAT PREGNANT WOMAN BLACK Local GRANDMOTHER’S SUDDEN DEATH FORCES PARENTS TO EXPLAIN TO CHILDREN WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SNITCH Local BLEEDING 9-YEAR-OLD ASKS TO GO TO SLAUGHTERHOUSE NURSE POLITICS Show all Breaking News NEW POLL FINDS MOST AMERICANS SEE BIDEN AS TOO OLD TO EFFECTIVELY LEAD CONGA LINE WASHINGTON—In a troubling sign for the incumbent president, a new poll released Monday by the Pew Research Center found that most Americans see President Joe Biden, 80, as too old to effectively lead a conga line. “Our data indicated that among both… Politics DEMOCRATS RESPOND TO JACKSONVILLE SHOOTING WITH PROPOSAL TO REMOVE BLACK PEOPLE FROM CIRCULATION Politics BODY LANGUAGE EXPERT EXPLAINS ALL REPUBLICAN DEBATE PARTICIPANTS JUST FINISHED HAVING SEX WITH EACH OTHER Breaking News AMERICANS REACT TO TRUMP’S MUG SHOT Politics DEFLATING CHRIS CHRISTIE WHIZZES AROUND DEBATE STAGE AFTER BEING POPPED BY U.S. FLAG PIN IN CASE YOU MISSED IT Breaking News SENSITIVE COLLEGE STUDENTS REQUIRE TRIGGER WARNING BEFORE SEEING PROFESSOR’S PENIS Breaking News TEXAS CANCELS SCHOOL OVER CONCERNS EXTREME HEAT NOT SAFE ENVIRONMENT FOR SHOOTINGS Breaking News MICHAEL OHER TRADED TO DIFFERENT WHITE FAMILY Breaking News YEVGENY PRIGOZHIN LEADS ARMY OF 25,000 UNDEAD TOWARD KREMLIN OPINION Show all Opinion AMERICANS REVEAL HOW THEY WOULD LIKE TO DIE IN THE CLIMATE APOCALYPSE Cartoons DOUBLE, DOUBLE, TOY AND TROUBLE Opinion AMERICANS GUESS TRUMP'S WEIGHT American Voices QUEEN’S ‘FAT BOTTOMED GIRLS’ CUT FROM ‘GREATEST HITS’ ALBUM FOR YOUNGER AUDIENCES ENTERTAINMENT Show all Magazine ‘THE GLOWING BALL STATE’, ‘BIG BRIGHTY’, ‘OL’ OUCHY’: AN ORAL HISTORY OF THE SUN Entertainment LEONARD BERNSTEIN’S CHILDREN RELEASE STATEMENT CONFIRMING FATHER WORE BIG PROSTHETIC NOSE IN REAL LIFE Magazine ‘STOP CALLING ME LATINX’: WHAT DEMOCRATS JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND ABOUT AZERBAIJANIS Entertainment EVERY SEASON FINALE OF DRAMA ENDS WITH CLOSE-UP OF SUPPOSEDLY DEAD CHARACTER’S EYES SPRINGING OPEN Football NFL PLAYERS SUSPENDED FOR VIOLATING DRAFTKINGS TERMS OF USE Basketball FREE AGENT KYRIE IRVING EXCITED TO ALIENATE ALL POTENTIAL OPTIONS Hockey VEGAS-AREA PAWN SHOP CELEBRATES BEING 6 WEEKS AWAY FROM OWNING STANLEY CUP Football TYREEK HILL SURPRISED TO DISCOVER ASSAULT ILLEGAL IN FLORIDA Siemens Energy New powerful gas turbine achieves maximum performanceSiemens Energy| SponsoredSponsored Learn More Undo OPEL Geht runter wie Öl.Ölwechsel inkl. Motoröl, Filter & Arbeitskosten für Fahrzeuge ab 4 Jahren nur 99 € (UPE).OPEL| SponsoredSponsored Mehr erfahren Undo Forge of Empires - Free Online Game Need to relax with a strategic game? Escape Reality with this fun gameForge of Empires - Free Online Game| SponsoredSponsored Sign Up Undo Siemens Energy Joint effort for decarbonization of power gridsSiemens Energy| SponsoredSponsored Learn More Undo OPEL Cooles Angebot!Sommeraktion: Klimaanlagenreinigung für Ihren Marke jetzt ab 74,90 €.OPEL| SponsoredSponsored Mehr erfahren Undo word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1 mmMwWLliI0fiflO&1