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Home / Children / Education


HOW TO GET ALONG WHEN CHILDREN ARE RELUCTANT TO COMMUNICATE?

By Marlene Marcus Pabolo January 24, 2022 Post a Comment

Communication is the most important thing when dealing with people. Whether it
is an adult or a child, as long as there are no barriers in communication, the
relationship between two people can be particularly good.

Human language is very rich. In addition to the language that can be expressed
orally, people's eyes, expressions, and actions can all be silent language. I
believe in the process of children growing up slowly.

When we communicate with children, we always encounter some problems. For
example, when the child is disobedient or when the child communicates with us,
the child always fails to grasp the key points of the language we express.
Marcus is four and a half years old this year. When I lived with him, he was
always very obedient.

No matter what I say to her, he can listen carefully and do it carefully.
However, when I leave the house for a period of time and ask his father to take
him, his father reflects that there are many bad habits in the child.

For example, when his father asked him to do something, he didn't pay attention
at all. When his father communicated with him, he always failed to grasp the key
points, which made his father very distressed. His father thinks there may be
some problems with the child's comprehension.

But I told the child's father that the child was always obedient when I was
taking care of the child, and he always expressed his opinion to me. So what is
the difference between me and my husband when we have children? Why does the
child only listen to me and not to him?




PROBLEMS WITH THE EXPRESSION OF THE PARENTS

PROBLEM 1. THE PURPOSE OF THE EXPRESSION IS NOT CLEAR

Whether we are communicating with children or adults, in order for the other
person to understand our needs, we must clearly express our purpose to the other
person. Why does the child never listen to the child's father when he
communicates with the child?

That's because he didn't express his purpose at all when communicating with the
child. The child listened to nothing, and naturally, he was unwilling to pay
attention to his father.

PROBLEM 2. NOT COMMUNICATING WITH CHILDREN FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF CHILDREN

I believe that when we are studying and working, one of the things we hate the
most is that teachers or tour leaders use their arrogant identities to pressure
us to do something. When we communicate with children, we do not think from the
perspective of children.

But as an elder, ordering the child will naturally produce some rebellious
emotions. In order to make children listen to us obediently, when we communicate
with children, we must communicate with children from the perspective of
children.




WHAT TO KEEP IN MIND WHEN COMMUNICATING WITH CHILDREN

ITEM 1. REPEATED EMPHASIS ON KEY WORDS

We all know that a four-and-a-half-year-old child is not very understanding, and
their logic is not very clear. When we say something to them, if we don’t repeat
the keywords a few times, then they can’t remember what the purpose of the thing
we want to express is?

What if we told our kids where to go to play this afternoon? Then we have to
repeat the time and place to go out to the children several times, let the
children remember the time to go out to play and prepare for going out to play
in advance.

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ITEM 2. RESPECT THE CHILD'S CHOICE

When communicating with children, why do children have some rebellious emotions
and like to fight against us? Most of this is because we don't respect our
children's choices.

When communicating with children, we must give children the right to choose, for
example, let them choose to play in the park or play with children in the
community.

We must let children have the right to choose, and children will be interested
in the language of their parents. When children hear that their parents are
starting to respect their choices, they also listen to their parents and
actively express their opinions.

A child who knows how to express his own opinions will become a very assertive
person when he grows up. I believe that making children independent and not
being led by others' language is what every parent wants to see most.

ITEM 3. SOLVE PROBLEMS MORE AND ARGUE LESS

No matter what age you are communicating with your child, there will always be
some differences of opinion between the child and ours. When there are some
differences between children and our views, we must not use our own language to
force children to agree with our views.

When communicating with children, what we can do more is to find the places
where the children's views are the same as ours, so as to seek common ground
while reserving differences. When the child's point of view is different from
ours, we have to try our best to solve this problem, instead of using our own
language to conquer the child all the time.

When children find that they are communicating with their parents, they have
been forced by their parents to agree with a certain thing.

ITEM 3. GUIDE CHILDREN TO THINK ABOUT WHAT WE SAY

When communicating with children, guide children to think about what we say,
which can exercise children's brain response-ability. When communicating with
children, let them have space to think, and let them tell us the answers after
thinking.

This will not only improve children's attention when listening to us but also
help children grow up to think about what other people or teachers say and make
them good people.


CONCLUSION

As children grow up, we will inevitably find that children have problems of one
kind or another. When children grow up, they will also appear rebellious. When
they start to no longer want to listen to us because of certain things or
certain viewpoints, we must start to learn to reflect on the way we communicate
with our children. When communicating with children, if you find the right way,
the children will naturally become well-behaved and sensible.

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