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YOUR BRAIN'S RESPONSE


YOUR BRAIN'S RESPONSE


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A manager rushing to a meeting late, frazzled. Two coworkers are having a
disagreement within earshot. Sitting down at a work dinner where everyone is
silent, but something is off—you can feel the tension. (You might even
contemplate cutting it with the knife right there in your place setting.) You
can see it, hear it, and even smell it: secondhand stress. 

Nothing Sneaks Past Your Brain
Humans are wired for survival, and we’re social animals. Both of those things
help explain why we’re so good at picking up on stress, even subconsciously. As
far as your survival-oriented brain is concerned, stress equals threats, and
threats are to be confronted or avoided. We know that from our body’s responses
to internal stress (increased heart rate, sweaty palms, dry mouth, etc.).Your
brain pays attention to other people’s stress cues just in case they are
potential threats to you.

Certain manifestations of stress are obvious, like seeing people throw their
hands up in disgust or hearing someone yelling. Other manifestations are less
obvious, but your brain is taking notes, nevertheless. Nonverbal cues like
breathing pattern shifts and stress hormones emitted through sweat are picked up
by the brain, according to happiness researchers Shawn Achor and Michelle
Gielan.



In his book Emotional Intelligence, psychologist Dr. Daniel Goleman coined the
term “amygdala hijack” to describe a knee-jerk, emotional response in which the
brain releases stress hormones in reaction to a perceived threat.



Empathetic People, Take Note 
We’re all prone to feeling secondhand stress, but people who aim to please
everyone are more likely to experience it. Psychotherapist Jonathan Alpert says
that people who have difficulty setting boundaries are at risk because they have
difficulty saying no and often put others’ needs before their own. One side
effect of this is taking on other people’s stress. 

Pro Tip: Email is another source of secondhand stress, particularly in the heat
of the moment. If you’re stressed and need to send a message, compose your
email, save it as a draft, and revisit it later. You might word things
differently when you’ve had a few moments to settle down.  


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