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Skip to content Menu ABOUT ABOUT US YOUNG LEADERS OUR TEAM GOVERNANCE GET INVOLVED DONATE JOIN US PARTNERSHIPS CAMPAIGNS RESOURCES EVENTS TRAINING SCHOOLS WORKPLACES ARTICLES CONTACT SHOP Donate WHAT ARE PRONOUNS AND WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT? * gender * family + friends * trans awareness week September 15, 2022 Looking for our Trans Awareness Week Pronouns Instagram series? It's right here! A pronoun is a word that refers to either the people talking (I or you) or someone/something that is being talked about (like she, it, them, and this). Pronouns like he, she and they specifically refer to the people that you are talking about. It is important to respect people's pronouns. You can't always know what someone's pronouns are by looking at them. Asking and correctly using someone's pronouns is one of the most basic ways to show your respect for gender identity. GENDERED PRONOUNS She and He are gendered pronouns. She is typically used by female-identifying people. Similarly, He is typically used by male-identifying people. Both of these are sometimes used by people who don’t identify as male or female. GENDER NEUTRAL PRONOUNS They, them, theirs are common gender neutral pronouns. These are basically pronouns that don’t imply ‘male’ or ‘female’. Gender neutral pronouns are typically used by gender diverse and non-binary identifying people. There are lots of other gender neutral pronouns. They can take a bit of getting used to, but it’s important to use the right ones. If you’re not sure, just politely ask. PERSONAL PRONOUNS Most people have personal pronouns. Whether they use she, he, or **they,**or anything else can depend that person’s gender identity. For example, it’s common for gender diverse people to prefer they, or other gender neutral pronouns. A female or male identifying person might prefer her or he pronouns respectively. WHY THEY’RE IMPORTANT There are lots of reasons why it’s important to use the pronouns that a person prefers. Put simply, though? It can make a person feel pretty shit when you use the wrong ones. If someone happens to use pronouns that are different to what you might expect, they’ve probably thought long and hard about which ones and why. Misgendering is a term used to describe accidentally or intentionally using incorrect pronouns about or towards a person. It can happen as an accident, and that's okay. But when it happens intentionally, it's pretty crappy. It’s not always easy to come out and tell people you’re trans* or that prefer a new set of pronouns, so using the right ones really is a big deal and a pretty awesome thing. GENITALS ≠ GENDER This is probably the biggest mistake you can make. It’s an easy assumption to make accidentally, but genitals and bodies in general don’t reflect anything about a person’s pronouns or gender. Above all else, don’t try to argue this with a person. Even if you personally disagree, a person who’s asking you to use new pronouns more than likely already has their mind made up, and will probably also feel pretty hurt. Basically, what’s more important? Someone’s anatomy, or their happiness? SLIPPING UP Yes, stuffing up is pretty bad, but it does happen. Using new pronouns for a person can take some getting used to. Some can sound pretty strange, and changing the words you use in general can be harder than expected. Slipping up can feel pretty awkward or even make you feel guilty, but it’s really important not to snap or take it out on the person you’re talking about or to. You might not pick it up instantly. If you do slip up (this bit's important), don't snap over it, or make a huge deal out of it. Just keep trying your best and move on. You'll get the hang of it with time! WHAT YOU CAN DO! Practice, practice, practice! Now that you've got the basics, start trying to use the correct pronouns where possible. Remember to always ask people what they prefer. Some people still might not openly use their new pronouns around everyone, like certain family members or friends, so check in and make sure not to 'out' anyone. Having good, supportive, understanding people around is huge for any young trans person figuring themselves out. By being there for your friends, you're making a big difference. SHARE THIS ARTICLE TweetShare Scroll to top RELATED ARTICLES Browse all articles What to talk about during Trans Awareness Week Trans Awareness Week is all about education, and being a great ally – back up your activity or event with meaningful conversations and action! Here's how. trans awareness week Trans Awareness Week Digital Resources Zoom backgrounds, educational content, social media images – everything you need to get involved in Trans Awareness Week trans awareness week What are pronouns and why are they important? You can't always know someone's pronouns just by looking at them. And once you know someone's pronouns, it's important to respect them! gender What to do when your child comes out Having a child come out is different for every family – but there heaps of positive ways to navigate any experience. family + friends STAY IN THE LOOP Subscribe * General updates * Youth * Schools * Workplaces * * * * * Minus18 is located on the land of the Yalakut Weelam Clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples, Australia’s First People and Traditional Custodians. We acknowledge their continued connection and contribution to land, water and community, and pay our respects to Elders past, present and emerging. Sovereignty was never ceded; this always was, always will be, Aboriginal land. * Annual report * Privacy * News and media * Access and inclusion * Governance