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logo * Newsletters * Subscribe * * Login * navigation logo Combined Shape STARTUP * Best Industries * Funding * Incubators * Business Plans * Naming * Home-Based Business * The UPS Store GROW * Strategy * Operations * Sales * Marketing * Customer Service * Franchises * Build LEAD * Conscious Leadership * Taking Care * Female Founders * Best in Business * Best Workplaces * Company Culture * Public Speaking * Hiring * HR/Benefits * Productivity INNOVATE * Creativity * Invent * Design * Pivot TECHNOLOGY * Cloud Computing * Social Media * Security * Data Detectives MONEY * Private Equity 50 * Exit Interview * Personal Capital * Bootstrapping * Crowdfunding * Venture Capital * Borrowing * Business Models * Personal Finance EVENTS * Upcoming Events * Inc. 5000 Vision Conference * Become a Sponsor BRANDVIEW * Cox Business * Deloitte * Intel * PPG * The UPS Store * Principal * Verizon Business * Whoop * Branded Content INC. 5000 * The 2020 US List * Inc. 5000 Regionals * Apply Inc. 5000 US SUBSCRIBE SUBSCRIBE * Watch * Guides Follow: * Group 5 * Group 3 * Fill 1 * Group 3 * Group 3 SUBSCRIBE * About * Staff * Columnists * Help Center Follow: * Group 5 * Group 3 * Fill 1 * Group 3 * Group 3 Top Stories Top Videos Working From Home New Survey: 61 Percent of Americans Would Take a Pay Cut to Keep Working Remotely E-commerce Your Business May Soon Be Able to Make In-App Sales on TikTok Logistics U.S. Eyes Partnership with Southeast Asia to Help Fix Supply Chain Issues Taking Care The FDA Grants Full Approval of the Pfizer-BioNTech Vaccine. Expect a Flurry of Employer Mandates Exit Strategies How This Founder Turned a Family Recipe Into $30 Million in Revenue and a Private-Equity Deal Taking Care Biden's Secret Weapon for Passing the $3.5 Trillion Budget Resolution: Small Business Startup Life In Online Dating, Being an Entrepreneur Is an Advantage--for One Group, at Least logo * Newsletters * Subscribe * * Login * navigation logo Combined Shape STARTUP * Best Industries * Funding * Incubators * Business Plans * Naming * Home-Based Business * The UPS Store GROW * Strategy * Operations * Sales * Marketing * Customer Service * Franchises * Build LEAD * Conscious Leadership * Taking Care * Female Founders * Best in Business * Best Workplaces * Company Culture * Public Speaking * Hiring * HR/Benefits * Productivity INNOVATE * Creativity * Invent * Design * Pivot TECHNOLOGY * Cloud Computing * Social Media * Security * Data Detectives MONEY * Private Equity 50 * Exit Interview * Personal Capital * Bootstrapping * Crowdfunding * Venture Capital * Borrowing * Business Models * Personal Finance EVENTS * Upcoming Events * Inc. 5000 Vision Conference * Become a Sponsor BRANDVIEW * Cox Business * Deloitte * Intel * PPG * The UPS Store * Principal * Verizon Business * Whoop * Branded Content INC. 5000 * The 2020 US List * Inc. 5000 Regionals * Apply Inc. 5000 US SUBSCRIBE SUBSCRIBE * Watch * Guides Follow: * Group 5 * Group 3 * Fill 1 * Group 3 * Group 3 SUBSCRIBE * About * Staff * Columnists * Help Center Follow: * Group 5 * Group 3 * Fill 1 * Group 3 * Group 3 Lead WHY EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT LEADERS REFUSE TO BELIEVE IN QUALITY TIME AND WHY JERRY SEINFELD BELIEVES IN GARBAGE TIME. * Shape * * By Jeff Haden, Contributing editor, Inc.@jeff_haden Getty Images One day a truck driver tipped a full trailer over in the parking lot of the manufacturing plant where I worked my way through college. As the low person on the totem pole, I got sent outside to untangle, unload, and re-stack the contents. An hour later, the plant manager poked his head in the trailer. I expected him to remind me of the urgency of the task. Or to ask for an estimated completion time. Or to tell me a better way to get the job done. Instead he said, "What do you want me to do?" And we spent the next five hours unloading the truck. It was weird at first. I was accustomed to hierarchy, and structure, and clearly defined roles. I had heard bosses were capable of physical labor, but I had never witnessed it firsthand. But I slowly grew more comfortable, mostly because we didn't talk much. He didn't pretend to want to get to know me. He didn't ask for input he wouldn't actually consider, much less use. In fact, I only remember one thing he said. We had just struggled to clear an awkward tangle of boxes and pallets, only to find that the front half of the trailer looked even worse. "Well," he said, hands on hips. "This f-ing sucks." And then we got back to work. When I walked into the locker room at the end of the day, a co-worker yelled, "College boy. Spending quality time with the boss!" But it hadn't been quality time. It wasn't planned. It wasn't "special." Those hours were what Jerry Seinfeld calls "garbage time." As Seinfeld says in relation to spending time with his kids: > I'm a believer in the ordinary and the mundane. These guys that talk about > "quality time" -- I always find that a little sad when they say, "We have > quality time." > > I don't want quality time. I want the garbage time. That's what I like. You > just see them in their room reading a comic book and you get to kind of watch > that for a minute, or a bowl of Cheerios at 11 o'clock at night when they're > not even supposed to be up. The garbage, that's what I love. Because that's when real life happens. Garbage time is when a moment is not planned and optimized to within an inch of its life. When a conversation is not fraught with meaning and purpose. When an interaction or event is not filled with expectation -- and accompanied by the resulting pressure to live up to those expectations. Over the next few years, the plant manager held regular all-hands meetings. Lots of planning and preparation took place ahead of time. They were supposed to be impactful. To foster a sense of meaning and purpose. To be special. The plant-wide meetings were "quality time." And were a waste of time. We never worked harder afterwards. Or smarter. Or more as a team. All the charts and graphs and management-speak were more off-putting than inspiring; the build-up was so great that the actual never lived up to the expectation. But I did walk out of that trailer wanting to work a little harder. Wanting to work a little smarter. Wanting to help the plant manager achieve the goals he set. (And willing to help him out, a couple decades later, when our roles were somewhat reversed and he needed a job.) Not because of anything he said. But because we had spent garbage time together. Garbage time is the best time. With co-workers. With employees. With friends and family, and especially your kids. Garbage time isn't weighted by the expectation that a moment will be special and memorable and perfect. Garbage time just is. Garbage time is when you learn a little more about who people are. When they learn a little more about you. When relationships are not forced, but naturally formed. Inc. helps entrepreneurs change the world. Get the advice you need to start, grow, and lead your business today. Subscribe here for unlimited access. Aug 25, 2021 Like this column? Sign up to subscribe to email alerts and you'll never miss a post. The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com. Newsletter logo INC. 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