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0 Skip to Content New Page Welcome Colleagues Donna Rockwell John Christopher Services Anxiety Therapy NYC Depression Therapy NYC Trauma & PTSD Therapy NYC Grief, Loss & Transitions Therapy NYC Addictions Therapy NYC Intimacy & Sexual Counseling NYC Young Adult, Millennial Therapy NYC Self Esteem Therapy NYC Medical Trauma/Chronic Pain Therapy NYC Codependency Therapy NYC Shame Therapy in NYC Transformational Coaching Concierge Therapy NYC Women's Hormone Health Individual Therapy Couple Therapy EMDR Consultation Bozeman Montana Telemedicine Training Offerings Urban Zen Integrative Therapy Mindfulness Meditation Somatic Experiencing Relaxation Gallery Free Associations Essential Oils Resources About Kim Quick Start Contact BOOK CONSULTATION Open Menu Close Menu New Page Welcome Colleagues Donna Rockwell John Christopher Services Anxiety Therapy NYC Depression Therapy NYC Trauma & PTSD Therapy NYC Grief, Loss & Transitions Therapy NYC Addictions Therapy NYC Intimacy & Sexual Counseling NYC Young Adult, Millennial Therapy NYC Self Esteem Therapy NYC Medical Trauma/Chronic Pain Therapy NYC Codependency Therapy NYC Shame Therapy in NYC Transformational Coaching Concierge Therapy NYC Women's Hormone Health Individual Therapy Couple Therapy EMDR Consultation Bozeman Montana Telemedicine Training Offerings Urban Zen Integrative Therapy Mindfulness Meditation Somatic Experiencing Relaxation Gallery Free Associations Essential Oils Resources About Kim Quick Start Contact BOOK CONSULTATION Open Menu Close Menu New Page Welcome Folder: Colleagues Folder: Services Individual Therapy Couple Therapy EMDR Consultation Bozeman Montana Telemedicine Training Folder: Offerings About Kim Quick Start Contact BOOK CONSULTATION Back Donna Rockwell John Christopher Back Anxiety Therapy NYC Depression Therapy NYC Trauma & PTSD Therapy NYC Grief, Loss & Transitions Therapy NYC Addictions Therapy NYC Intimacy & Sexual Counseling NYC Young Adult, Millennial Therapy NYC Self Esteem Therapy NYC Medical Trauma/Chronic Pain Therapy NYC Codependency Therapy NYC Shame Therapy in NYC Transformational Coaching Concierge Therapy NYC Women's Hormone Health Back Urban Zen Integrative Therapy Mindfulness Meditation Somatic Experiencing Relaxation Gallery Free Associations Essential Oils Resources PSYCHOTHERAPY EMDR CONSULTATION CURATED THERAPY PRACTICES TO TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE > “It’s a joy to be hidden and a disaster not to be found.” — D W Winnicott NEW YORK CITY VIRTUAL Schedule Consultation > “I’m delighted to offer a therapy approach that is a synthesis of highly > effective therapies, including psychodynamic psychotherapy, CBT, EMDR, Somatic > Experiencing® and Internal Family Systems, which are compatible with the > neurobiology of trauma. When woven together, this approach has been > transformative for clients, and in less time than traditional talk therapy, > sometimes just a few sessions. Someone with a complex trauma history will need > more time, but healing does happen. Together, we target the source and help > the Brain Re-Wire with More Adaptive Neural Networks. ” The essence of my practice is to help clients cultivate resilience, vitality, inner strength and enhanced emotional health and well-being. I provide evidence-based psychotherapy for anxiety, depression, stress, grief, relationship concerns, life transitions, and personal growth, which leads to symptom relief and enhanced emotional well-being. With advanced, specialized training in trauma resolution, our focus is releasing trauma wounds and restoring the integrity of your nervous system. My integrative philosophy honors healing the source of distress, and is rooted in psychology, physiology, and the neuroscience of emotions, connection and relationships. Together, we target your emotional, cognitive and somatic symptoms using modern, evidenced based therapies. Mostly, I help people navigate the everyday problems and challenges in their lives. As you search for a therapist, you can feel confident that effective therapy will help you with the following: feel understood, supported and empowered; develop a deeper understanding of yourself and others; gain clarity and perspective of your situation; develop healthier boundaries and communication skills, resolve negative patterns, self-sabotage and poor coping adaptations; gain control of your thoughts, feelings and emotions; and enjoy a healthier relationship with yourself and others. Effective therapy will help you experience greater resilience so that your innate strengths are more available to you, which means you will naturally be better equipped to handle future challenges. I offer ongoing, weekly psychotherapy, quick consults for specific problems, EMDR therapy, couples therapy and coaching. VIEW ADVANCED TRAINING ABOUT Kim Seelbrede is an experienced New York State Licensed Psychotherapist, Advanced EMDR & Somatic Practitioner and Couple Therapist with extensive post-graduate training in Psychology and Mind-Body Medicine. She maintains private practices in New York City and Bozeman Montana. Kim completed graduate studies with high honors from New York University, and continues to expand her knowledge and skills through ongoing advanced trainings. She is grateful to have trained with world-renowned experts in many areas, which allows her to offer traditional and cutting-edge transformational approaches. Her compassionate, direct and authentic teaching and therapeutic manner allows her to deliver excellent, comprehensive psychological care to her clients. As a New Yorker, Kim Seelbrede has experience working with successful, high-functioning Manhattan professionals and high-profile clients who struggle to experience optimal emotional health, well-being and work/life balance.AD MORE learn more CONSULTATION ARE YOU STRUGGLING WITH SOMETHING AND NEED HELP FAST? AT TIMES, I AM ABLE TO OFFER APPOINTMENTS WITHIN A DAY OR SO AFTER YOU REACH OUT. SEND ME A TEXT OR EMAIL TO SCHEDULE. FREE YOUR MIND, LIVE YOUR LIFE AGAIN! I specialize in consultation appointments that focus on helping you move quickly towards resolution of a particular problem, or symptom relief from anxiety, panic attacks, depression, a troubling circumstance and relationship concerns. Not all problems require the commitment of a long-term psychotherapy model. You may have a particular issue or circumstance that would benefit from one or several highly-focused therapy sessions designed to get you back to living your life. I specialize in comprehensive, highly-focused consultation appointments that provide you with a wealth of information, as well as helpful insight, support, coping skills and a plan to move forward. Most clients would say that they gained clarity and felt better about their situation after the initial consultation whether we decide to work together or not. Consultation appointments are short-term, solution-oriented sessions which will help you gain support, perspective, clarity, guidance, resources and direction. Text to schedule CONCERNS * Toxic Shame, negative self-concept, low-self-esteem * Dissociation, numbness or hypoarousal, hyperarousal * Addictions, substance abuse, compulsions + poor coping skills * Boundaries, personal empowerment, identification of needs, trouble saying no, compliance, appeasement + accommodation * Interpersonal effectiveness, + conflict avoidance * Empaths, HSP’S, adult children of narcissists and borderline parents * Codependency, submissiveness + recovery from family enmeshment * Guilt, loss, grief + prolonged bereavement * Sexual concerns, sex-positive therapy, alternative lifestyle * Depression (postpartum depression, SAD, bipolar disorder, situational depression, chronic sadness) * Anxiety, panic disorder, social anxiety, phobias, rumination, insomnia * Crisis counseling, life-challenges + difficult transitions * Self-sabotage, blocking beliefs, fear of success + failure * Dysfunctional relationships, communication issues, work dynamics * Spiritual or existential concerns, shadow work, purpose + energetic blocks * Chronic stress, chronic pain, work/life balance * Hormone imbalance, menopause, medical diagnosis, autoimmune disorders * Problem relationship patterns, dynamics + repetition compulsion THRIVE CHOOSE THRIVING OVER SURVIVING BEGIN YOUR HEALING JOURNEY. VISIT MY QUICK START PAGE! PHILOSOPHY YOU HAVE WITHIN YOU THE INNATE POWER TO BE WELL. YOUR BODY HOLDS THE SYMPTOMS AND THE WISDOM TO FULLY HEAL… As an Integrative Psychotherapist, I am less likely to adhere to a single psychological philosophy, but rather draw from a combination of traditional, somatic, evidence-based and cutting-edge practices that I’ve learned in my professional, advanced studies. Your therapy journey is unique to you, your needs, your circumstances. In my experience, an individualized approach will best support optimal growth and change. My earliest training was a psychodynamic and relational model, which remains the foundation of my approach. I believe in the healing power of the therapy relationship, as well as the transformation and growth that occurs with cognitive strategies, psychological insight and the development of self-awareness. I believe therapists do their clients a disservice by just focusing on the cognitive, and ignoring the symptoms and wisdom held in the body where life-experiences live. Some evidence-based and mind-body techniques that I integrate include: EMDR therapy, CBT and DBT skills, positive neuroplasticity techniques, attachment-focused therapy, mindfulness-based practices, focusing-oriented therapy, somatic experiencing, couples therapy techniques (Gottman, EFT), psychodynamic psychotherapy, as examples. READ MORE METHODS RELATIONAL, INTERPERSONAL PSYCHOTHERAPY PSYCHOANALYTIC PSYCHOTHERAPY EMDR THERAPY & SOMATIC EXPERIENCING® INTERNAL FAMILY SYSTEMS (IFS) COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY (CBT) MINDFULNESS-BASED PRACTICES ATTACHMENT-FOCUSED COUPLES THERAPY TRANSFORMATIONAL LIFE COACHING POSITIVE NEUROPLASTICITY SERVICES 01. INDIVIDUAL PSYCHOTHERAPY Individual therapy is for anyone wishing to better understand their personal life, work life, or relationships within the context of one-on-one conversations with a therapist. 02. MARRIAGE + COUPLE THERAPY Couples therapy is for partnered individuals experiencing conflict, communication issues, sexual/intimacy problems, or any other relationship distress. 03. EMDR + SOMATIC THERAPY EMDR therapy is a modality that helps clients heal from traumatic experiences, as well as anxiety, depression, addiction, negative self-concepts, performance problems and much more. 04. CONSULTATION APPOINTMENT Not all problems require the commitment of ongoing therapy. Consultation appointments are brief, 1-3 sessions offering guidance, clarity and solutions to a range of concerns. View All services TESTIMONIALS Reviews I would highly recommend Kim Seelbrede for her therapy services. I gained so much insight and help from our first meeting which we did using teletherapy . Very quickly she helped me understand my situation and come up with a plan to address my problems. I left that first session feeling better and more hopeful than I had in my previous therapy. The sessions that followed helped alleviate my anxiety and depression and she gave me some good tools to use for future problems. I also highly recommend teletherapy as it really works. J, Manhattan. Kim’s EMDR work is transformational and has truly changed my life. I can say that I’ve been able to release my emotional traumas and change some long-standing patterns and behaviors. I also very much appreciated her warmth, wisdom and creativity. W, NYC I am writing to let you know that you saved my marriage when we were in a crisis. We are very grateful for your expertise in dealing with our situation and helping us understand the deeper issues that were impacting us. We both felt supported throughout and were able to heal some wounds and re-connect with new tools for the future. You may have noticed that I’ve referred friends and colleagues to you for your guidance. With gratitude. R, London England Kim Seelbrede helped our family through a very challenging time. Her unwavering support and guidance was key to our becoming whole again. We all felt supported throughout our time and we ended with skills and hope for my daughter. E, NYC Kimberly showed me that I can be resilient through some terrifying parts of my life and we worked through many traumas. Her meditations were incredibly helpful. I use them to this day. M, California Your counseling and intuitive work has helped me with some major challenges with my work and family. Even though we’ve never met in person, I feel a deep connection and support in our work together. I always appreciate your depth and insight. Online therapy sessions were better than I had hoped. L, Maine Kimberly is a gifted therapist and very open and understanding. I am a physician with a busy work and personal life. Her relationship guidance and advice was extremely helpful. As a scientist, I yearned for deeper meaning. She has helped me connect to my spiritual side and has been my spiritual counselor and go-to therapist for years. Her guided meditations are unbelievable. -MD, Manhattan EMDR+ WELCOME TO A DEEPER HEALING JOURNEY WHERE GREATER TRANSFORMATION IS POSSIBLE… When traditional “talk” therapy is not enough to resolve distressing symptoms, it’s time to try a different model of care. EMDR therapy is the one treatment method that is consistently powerful for my clients, especially when combined with other proven and highly-effective therapy techniques that are compatible with the neurobiology of trauma. I’ve trained in many modalities, yet I find myself returning to EMDR again and again. EMDR Therapy has changed my practice because it works, and it transforms suffering, thus lives. Depending on your unique needs, chosen therapy modalities may include: EMDR, Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, CBT, Internal Family Systems, Mindfulness and Somatic Experiencing®. EMDR treatment is an extensively researched, proven and effective method to help people recover from distressing life experiences, trauma, anxiety, panic, phobias, accidents and much more. EMDR is not just for trauma, it is also an excellent technique to enhance performance for athletes and creatives, work and professional endeavors. In many instances EMDR can be offered to clients virtually. Virtual EMDR is an effective and powerful tool to add to your therapy healing journey, as an adjunct to your existing therapy or as a stand-alone solution. I now offer an intensive EMDR model for clients, when appropriate, which may be a healing option to speed recovery and processing READY TO HEAL AND TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE WITH EMDR THERAPY? Learn more COUPLES WHAT DOESN’T GET REPAIRED GETS REPEATED IN ALL SIGNIFICANT RELATIONSHIPS… Couples tend to enter therapy feeling confused, betrayed, misunderstood, wounded, resentful, lonely, disconnected and weary after years of trying to manage their problems alone. I provide attachment-focused couples therapy that allows partners to identify patterns and dynamics that have origins in the past, that are now being reenacted in the present. These habitual and unhelpful patterns kept partners from enjoying a mature and reality-based relationship. A here-and-now relationship helps partners respond to the underlying needs and emotions that form the basis of trust and safety in all significant relationships. The marriage and couples therapy that I offer supports couples in creating and strengthening emotional bonds, which can lead to increased feelings of security and closeness in both partners. Because partners bring their own unique dynamics into relationships, effective couples therapy can help motivated partners navigate difficult transitions and challenges, and also heal trauma wounds when present. In many cases, couples have suffered a trauma in their relationship, such as a betrayal or infidelity, a difficult loss or change in circumstance, or another type of crisis that creates relational stress. I welcome all types of relationships and have experience working with married, unmarried, polyamorous, kink, LGBTQ, and bi-racial couples. I offer online couples and marriage counseling to busy New Yorkers, which means we can meet in the comfort of your own home or the personal space of your choosing using a HIPPA-compliant, easy to use Telehealth platform. In my work with couples, I blend what I’ve found to be helpful including elements of Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT), The Gottman Method, psychodynamic psychotherapy, EMDR and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. IDENTIFY AND BREAK UNHELPFUL PATTERNS THAT LEAD TO RESENTMENT, DISCONNECT AND CHRONIC RELATIONSHIP DISTRESS… Learn more PSYCHOTHERAPY HEAL YOUR PAST, RECLAIM YOUR FUTURE… You are here because you may feel lost, “stuck” or face difficult circumstances. Lifelong patterns and dynamics that are not identified and repaired are repeated again and again. Getting support from someone on the outside, like an experienced therapist, can give you the clarity you need to process these experiences, so you can have a mature, realistic and reality-based relationship with yourself and others. The support and insight you receive in therapy can help you develop healthier coping skills and uncover the unconscious conflicts and obstacles that are keeping you from having the life that you desire. Gaining the necessary insight to make changes and increase self-awareness can greatly enhance many aspects of your life, including your relationships and professional achievement. The therapy process can help you have healthier relationships, gain new perspectives, reach your goals and remain resilient during stressful and challenging times. Therapy can help you feel less alone with your problems or life-challenges, as well as feel supported as you work to improve your circumstances. In an effort to better understand what may be making your life feel difficult, we’ll explore your experience and customize specific tools you can start using immediately to feel better and have more control of your emotions and your life, such as movement, nutrition and sleep. As a New York State licensed Psychotherapist, I am delighted to offer busy New Yorkers virtual therapy that is highly-individualized, effective and convenient. THERAPY HELPS YOU FEEL BETTER, WORK BETTER AND LIVE BETTER. Learn more EXPECTATIONS * Gain support through a personal crisis, transition, loss, trauma or challenging situation * Uncover unconscious obstacles and blocking beliefs that may be sabotaging your success and happiness * Address dissociation, body image, eating disorders, compulsions, addictions, substance use or abuse and obsessions using cutting-edge therapies such as specific EMDR Therapy protocols and Somatic Experiencing Techniques * Learn to identify important thoughts, feelings, emotions and motivations * Develop enhanced self-awareness as well as empathy and compassion for self and others * Break through blocks in intimacy; detach from unhealthy relationships; break patterns of repetition in significant relationships * Learn to identify triggers that lead to anger, confusion and relationship dysfunction * Develop effective, assertive communication skills in personal and professional situations * Learn more adaptive coping skills, self-care rituals, self-acceptance, mindfulness and habits to create a healthy work-life balance * Uncover patterns of crippling perfectionism that interfere with achievement, success and personal happiness * Process and heal painful feelings of loneliness, disappointment, sadness, loss, grief, guilt, shame, anger, envy and fear * Resolve trauma and abuse symptoms, develop healthier boundaries and heal early attachment wounds * Obtain consultations for referrals to psychopharmacologists, psychiatrists, psychologists, mental health experts, allied professionals, conventional and alternative medical practitioners VIRTUALLY WHEREVER YOU ARE IN THE WORLD, YOU CAN KEEP YOUR THERAPY APPOINTMENT > “As A Licensed Psychotherapist With A Private Practice In New York City, I > Know That Busy New Yorkers Can’t Always Take Time Out Of Their Day Or Week To > Commute To Therapy Sessions. Teletherapy Is A Modern Option That Has Become > The Preferred Way To Conduct Therapy And Counseling For Many, Especially Those > Who Work Or Travel, Couples With Young Children Or Different Schedules, Young > Adults, College Students, Expats And Individuals In Remote Areas Without > Access To Licensed Mental Health Professionals. In Case You Were Wondering, > Research Now Shows That Therapy Sessions Conducted By Telehealth Are Just As > Effective As Face To Face Sessions. ” learn more FOLLOW KIMBERLY SEELBREDE, LCSW, LLC INTEGRATIVE PSYCHOTHERAPY & MIND BODY MEDICINE, LLC Licensed Psychotherapist: New York #079234 New Mexico #C-10863 All website photography by Kim Seelbrede Integrative Psychotherapy New York is a Boutique Psychotherapy Practice serving residents of New York, New York City, Long Island, Brooklyn and Virtually. We are licensed to practice Psychotherapy and are reimbursed by insurance. Kim Seelbrede and colleagues offer Adult Psychotherapy & Counseling, Somatic & EMDR Therapy, Trauma-Informed Treatment, Mindfulness & Meditation, Marriage & Couple Therapy, Psychological Consultation & Transformational Life Coaching. SUBSCRIBE Sign up with your email address to receive news and updates. Email Address Sign Up We respect your privacy. Thank you! To navigate, press the arrow keys. Keyboard shortcuts Map DataMap data ©2022 Google Map data ©2022 Google 2 km Terms of Use Report a map error THERAPY FAQ’S * HOW DO I BEGIN VIRTUAL COUNSELING AND WHAT DO I NEED TO HAVE EFFECTIVE THERAPY? You live in New York and would like to begin therapy but committing to an office commute makes it all feel too difficult. Modern technology makes working with your therapist virtually easy. I am able to use FaceTime, Skype, Doxyme or your preferred way of connecting. My favorite way to connect is using SimplePractice which is secure and HIPPA-compliant. Once we’ve agreed to work together, I add you to my system and send you a link. What do you need? You must have a reliable WiFi connection and a computer, tablet or phone. You can use the browser of your choice or you can download the SimplePractice App. You will also need privacy and to be in an area that offers few distractions. If you live in New York, I am licensed to practice psychotherapy, and as such, you may be able to be reimbursed for therapy sessions. If you live outside of New York and Manhattan, I offer coaching and consultation appointments. * WHAT THERAPY OPTIONS DO YOU OFFER ONLINE AND CAN WE DO EMDR VIRTUALLY? As a New York City-based psychotherapist, I am able to provide many of the same clinical approaches in my work with online clients that I use in-person, including: psychodynamic psychotherapy, EMDR therapy, focusing-oriented therapy, cognitive therapy and CBT skills, mindfulness, meditation support, self-care practices, couples therapy, coaching techniques and positive neuroplasticity techniques. Yes, it’s possible to do EMDR therapy online in some circumstances with stable and healthier clients. In many situations and for high-functioning clients, EMDR therapy can be done online using any number of online communication tools such as skype, facetime, or a HIPPA-compliant platform. EMDR therapy works by using bilateral stimulation of the brain, either through eye movements or tapping, while focusing on negative beliefs, experiences and memories. EMDR therapy conducted online is done using * DO YOU OFFER FLASH CONSULTATION APPOINTMENTS AND COACHING ONLINE? Many opt for short-term therapy for a variety of reasons. I consult with individuals and families about personal and life challenges, a difficult transition or a crisis that may benefit from a focused, solution-based approach using assessment, education, guidance, advice, support and appropriate resources. One example might be a family member who is struggling with an addiction and/or a mental health issue. Consultations tend to be time-limited, solution-focused and goal-oriented in nature. Therapy consultations allow a client, parent or family member to explore concerns and to make decisions or changes in their lives that move them in a helpful direction. The consultation process is an opportunity to speak extensively about any problems and concerns in your current situation. What makes this different from psychotherapy is that the experience is limited, usually only two or three sessions, sometimes more, and is not meant to replace ongoing therapy. A consultation can help a client gain advice, insight, perspective, guidance and resources for their particular circumstance. At the end of the consultation process, I offer clients my assessment and a recommendation for treatment or referrals. I provide consultation services to individuals, those seeking second opinions, parents, concerned family members, mental health professionals on case concerns, and other professionals. Consultations can be conducted by telephone, online via Skype or a secure, HIPPA compliant internet source and are especially helpful for those who do not have access to a therapist because they live in remote areas and don’t have access to skilled, experienced therapists. * DO YOU PROVIDE ONLINE MARRIAGE, COUPLE AND FAMILY THERAPY? Online couples counseling sessions are delivered through a HIPAA protected online video platform called SimplePractice. Remote therapy provides confidentiality and is regulated by the same local and federal laws as “in office” therapy. The software that I use is easy and similar to Skype or FaceTime. My clients quickly become accustomed to the platform and many find that Teletherapy is as effective as in-person sessions. Telehealth counseling can be used anytime from the comfort of your home and is a great option for clients who have children, busy schedules or are in different locations but still want to receive counseling. So yes, my clients who prefer online relationship, marriage or couples counseling are quite satisfied with virtual sessions. * COACHING VS THERAPY, IS THERE A DIFFERENCE? What’s the difference between life coaching and therapy? In my opinion, the short answer is not very much. Many individuals prefer to be coached as it feels less stigmatizing to hire a coach. It is often said that coaches work with healthy people and therapists work with the mentally ill. Actually, therapists often work with healthy individuals in the form of brief and focused work, and even long term therapy. And coaches, because they are not trained to work with mental health concerns, are often coaching individuals who would be better served working with professionals. Coaching, a billion-dollar industry, seems to be a more palatable option for many because of the mental health stigma in our culture. Truth is, you can have positive and negative experiences with both. What follows is a longer answer to the question, “what’s the difference between therapy and coaching.” Therapists and life coaches are frequently asked the question, and I believe the differences are overstated. Coaches and therapists tend to say that “coaching is present-focused” and that “therapy focuses on the past and pathology.” I wish it were this simple, but I feel it’s impossible to be this absolute about what’s actually happening during the coaching or therapy sessions. In my opinion, therapists provide coaching and coaches are frequently diving into the scope of therapy, without a license. This can get murky. Tony Robbins, on his website states that “one of the most common misconceptions about life coaching is that it is therapy in disguise – or worse yet –therapy from an unlicensed practitioner. In reality, life coaching is truly its own unique service designed to help ambitious achievers meet the outcomes that will bring them success and fulfillment in any and all areas of life.” Robbins goes on to say “In life coaching, a client works with a coach who is not a healthcare professional to clarify goals and identify obstacles and problematic behaviors in order to create action plans to achieve desired results. The main way that a life coach vs. therapist works is that the life coach takes the client’s current starting point as an acceptable neutral ground and is more action-based from that point onward. A life coach enables the person receiving treatment to take control of their life and take action to steer it toward their goals.” So, what happens when the “ambitious achiever” reaches out to fix their problems? A client makes contact because they are missing something in their life or they feel stuck. They would like to fulfill their dreams, feel happier, be more successful, have better relationships. Together they begin mining for the reasons these goals are not currently being met. They dig deeper in the spirit of understanding the source. For the work to be helpful, it’s generally useful to acknowledge that problems have deeper roots. Patterns are also maintained for some pretty adaptive reasons even if unhelpful in the present. Professionals collaborate with their client to identify the “obstacles and problematic behaviors” in order to co-create “action plan” that Tony Robbins mentions on his coaching website. The action plan is meant to help the client move forward. The therapist or coach then begins to look at the clients life. Coaches employ helpful tools such as the wheel of life, re-named by many coaches and groups, but still the same tool designed to help clients look at the many aspects of their lives. These areas generally consist of 8-20 areas that can be evaluated and measured to determine life satisfaction and life balance. As they look at the areas that are solid as well as deficient, they discover a theme. Let’s use depletion as an example.They notice in the Wheel of Life that they are not thriving in areas like money, career, body satisfaction, community, negative habits, play, etc. and naturally determine that they have trouble setting boundaries and saying no. Let’s dive deep into the problem of “sociotropy” otherwise know as “people pleasing.” If a coach is trying to help a client understand why they continue as a people pleaser, this will require some digging around and honest inquiry into how that symptom came to be. Obviously, you can’t just tell them to stop the behavior because that just wouldn’t work! It’s a complicated, long-perfected strategy that has served the client in many ways, some good and adaptive, some not so good. As a young developing child, and for some, as a trauma response, it was adaptive. Now, it’s keeping the client from having the life and dream they desire. They are too depleted and exhausted to thrive because they are over extended. Why does this symptom develop? Sometimes they’ve had this modeled by a parent, but often, it is deeply-rooted in the desire to be cared for, or other deeply-held beliefs such as “I don’t deserve…” or “I am not enough.” Many coaches would say you’ve developed this personality aspect to manipulate or feel like a superior human by taking on so much, but that misses the point. What happened is that you learned to dissociate, that is, you’ve disconnected from yourself, others, your life. It’s a deeper wound that needs tending to. It is often a primal fear of being rejected, abandoned and left alone. Coaching would offer support and accountability around setting boundaries for a client, helpful, but likely not enough for many. If you are a people-pleaser and would like to make strides in your life, I recommend finding a therapist who is trained in IFS or Internal Family Systems. This type of therapy can help you compassionately understand and heal the exiled parts of yourself (the wounded kid in you) that keeps you imprisioned. You may also find that EMDR therapy and Somatic Experiencing provides complete healing with these early experiences and will help you strengthen your inner resources so that you can live a more authentic life. * WHAT CHANGES CAN I EXPECT TO SEE IN THERAPY AND WHAT KIND OF THERAPY SHOULD I LOOK FOR? The change that you seek begins with the decision to move forward and take action. The help that you gain from therapy depends on many things, but motivation is a key factor. Effective therapy helps you understand the relationship between your thoughts, feelings, emotions, perceptions, values, and behaviors, as examples. Good therapy outcomes help you gain relief from unpleasant feelings and thoughts, create more fulfilling and meaningful relationships, and gain more pleasure, mastery and control in your life. As a successful psychotherapist with a private practice in New York City, I can tell you that many people are afraid to reach out for help, and for various reasons. Even savvy, sophisticated New Yorkers struggle with asking for help as it relates to mind, body, emotions and behaviors. Sadly, the stigma around getting help for emotional issues and mental health care still exists in our culture, even though all of us at one time or another will struggle with mental health concerns, even if mild. The lack of support for mental health care results in a barrier to treatment for so many who would benefit. Mental health professionals such as psychologists, clinical social workers and professional counselors are often viewed as threatening. It seems that our society is unable and unwilling to give mental health the same priority as physical health, and yet, there is an exquisite interplay between the mind and body, as research reveals. Chronic stress and all levels of unresolved trauma can lead to changes in various parts of the brain which affects mood, behavior and other important functions. Unprocessed negative experiences and traumas are also the source of many modern physical ailments. Some examples of trauma and PTSD-related physical concerns include: cardiovascular disease, arthritis, asthma, chronic pain, diabetes, GI issues, dermatological problems, fibromyalgia, as some examples. And of course, the emotional problems that mental health experts see are: anxiety, depression, panic, agoraphobia, dissociation, self-harm, alcohol abuse, addictions, as examples. Stressful events impact us in many ways. Stephen Porges, Ph.D who developed the polyvagal hypothesis, proposed that our sensory systems have developed so we can feel things like closeness and comfort around others. However, when we experience peril, no matter how big the threat, the other, crude pieces of our sensory system kick in. This causes fight, flight and freeze which controls our reaction, and the entire parasympathetic sensory system. When we fail to successfully process and move through these experiences, large and small, our nervous systems are negatively impacted and we suffer the physical and mental health consequences. For this reason, many psychotherapists integrate healing somatic practices into traditional psychotherapy sessions. Which is to say that we all suffer to some degree and mental health matters; tending to your mind and mental health should be tended to in the same way that we care for the body. You may say that you don’t need to work with a therapist because you have people in your life to talk to. Or perhaps you struggle with not wanting to burden others with your problems. Even though you may have good friends or family members to talk with, a trained psychotherapist or psychologist has the expert professional training to help you see things through a new or different lens, and even challenge and support you in ways that the people in your life cannot because they are to close and have blindspots. A skilled psychotherapist can also teach you ways to ease the distressing symptoms you may be experiencing, such as internal conflict, self-sabotage, anger, stress, panic, overwhelm, anxiety, insomnia, chronic pain, depression and substance use, addictions and relationship problems. Experts can help you identify and move through blocks and obstacles to good mental health. Your mental health concerns have lead to years and decades of suffering, shame and embarrassment. You may not know this, but you do deserve to have a healthier relationship with yourself and others. When you decide to reach out for help and work with a psychotherapist or other professional who practices in New York, effective therapy and counseling can help you gain relief from unpleasant feelings and thoughts, create more fulfilling and meaningful relationships, and gain more pleasure and control in your life. The right kind of therapy can help you get to the root of your distress, and release it, as well as help you learn ways to become more self-aware, cope with difficult emotions, improve your mood, gain control, feel connected to others, develop the skills to handle future problems, and live a more fulfilling and satisfying life. Therapy can help you know yourself better, and this can generalize to understanding others, both personally and professionally. Psychotherapists can provide support, practical problem-solving skills, and enhanced coping strategies for many challenges and issues, including helping you feel less alone with your problems. Many people also find that counselors or psychotherapists can help with career concerns, professional relationships, self-esteem, family of origin concerns, marriage issues, sexuality, identity concerns, parenting challenges, developing healthier habits, understanding thoughts, feelings and emotions, balancing the stress of daily life and goal-setting. Trained mental health professionals can help you see the things that you cannot and the ways in which you self-sabotage. Many people who would benefit from working with a therapist present to the world as “having it together,” but quietly, they suffer. In my Manhattan psychotherapy practice, I see high-achieving, very successful individuals who experience emptiness, unhappiness, disappointment, loneliness, stress, anxiety, addictive states and relationship dysfunction. These concerns can lead to less than desirable coping solutions such as addictions, alcohol and drug abuse, eating problems, other behavioral concerns, distress in relationships and sleep deficits. Psychotherapists and psychologists can provide a fresh perspective on a difficult problem or help their clients discover helpful solutions. Many lasting benefits can be obtained from personal counseling, marriage and couples therapy and group therapy. You can learn more about therapy from the American Psychological Association or APA which has helpful information about a range of mental health concerns. As it pertains to de-mystifying and de-stigmatizing mental health, we should talk about mental health problems the same way we discuss a virus or diabetes, and we should have conversations with kids, early, in an effort to normalize a range of mental health problems. When you search for a therapist, psychotherapist or psychologist in New York, you may be confused about the right kind of therapy for you. It’s is very confusing especially with so many useful and effective therapies and modalities. This depends on your needs and symptoms. There are many types of good therapy that can assist healing. What follows are some common types of psychotherapy that many mental health professionals may recommend. Psychodynamic psychotherapy or insight-oriented therapy is a type of talk therapy that focuses on identifying internal conflicts and resolving negative emotions and behavior patterns rooted in past experiences. Free association is encouraged as you discuss whatever is on your mind. New York City offers an array of therapists, including psychoanalysts. You and your therapist will then work through past experiences and identify unconscious patterns of emotions and behaviors that are impacting your ability of have the life that you desire and the relationships you need. As you learn how the experiences in your past may have influenced your behaviors in the here and now, you learn new skills to overcome unhealthy behaviors. Psychodynamic psychotherapy is typically used to treat anxiety and mood disorders, panic disorder, phobias, self-sabotage and traumatic experiences. Interpersonal therapy (IPT) focuses on your interpersonal relationships to improve interpersonal skills. During IPT, you’ll work with your therapist to assess your social interactions, identify negative patterns, and learn new ways to interact positively with other people daily. These improved relational skills generalize to both your personal and professional relationships. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) uses a combination of cognitive therapy and behavioral therapy to explore the relationships between your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. During CBT, you’ll work closely with your therapist to identify unhealthy thought patterns and how they may be causing your problematic behaviors and beliefs. By learning to recognize negative thought patterns, you’ll develop healthy ways of thinking that may lead to more positive beliefs and behavior patterns. If self-esteem is an issue, CBT can help you replace negative thoughts about yourself with different, healthier and more realistic self-concepts. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) combines CBT methods with mindfulness techniques. Originally used to treat borderline personality disorder (BPD), DBT involves a combination of both individual and group therapy. Currently, psychologists and psychotherapists use DBT methods to treat addictions and substance abuse, eating disorders, a range of personality disorders, and self-harming behaviors. Additionally, various mental health disorders, including depression, bipolar disorder, and anxiety disorders can be successfully treated by DBT therapy. DBT builds on CBT by emphasizing validation and the acceptance of negative feelings, thoughts and behaviors instead of struggling. DBT also helps reduce the frequency of dangerous behaviors by supporting individual strengths, increasing coping skills, and using positive reinforcement to motivate change. Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) is commonly used to treat PTSD. EMDR is a modality that practitioners commonly integrate with other therapy modalities. According to previous studies, EMDR is the most effective, short-term intervention to reduce the emotional distress associated with traumatic experiences. EMDR is now used to support and help patients heal from a range of mental health concerns, including depression, self-sabotage, negative self-worth and more. Many patients require fewer sessions compared to other types of treatment to resolve symptoms. During EMDR, patients learn new ways to replace adverse emotional reactions with more positive responses and beliefs. Many New York psychotherapists offer EMDR therapy as part of their treatment offerings and many are happy to provide adjunctive EMDR as you continue to work with your own therapist. Group counseling and support groups are beneficial for individuals with a variety of concerns, including: obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), substance abuse, addiction, depression, loss and grief, and more. By connecting with others in a group setting, patients can find new ways to cope with challenging situations and gain support of the group community. Many feel helped and supported in group treatment settings. Couples counseling and family therapy are forms of counseling in which couples or families work with a psychotherapist to sort out difficulties in their relationships. Relationship and marriage counseling helps couples resolve infidelity and betrayal, intimacy and sexual problems, communications difficulties, dysfunctional dynamics and more. Family therapy is useful to address family dynamics and can help family members and loved ones understand and support those with mental health disorders, especially individuals with eating disorders, addictions, depression. There are many types of effective therapies and it’s worth researching the best kind of therapy for you. Psychology Today offers a helpful list of the many types of modalities to help you heal and thrive. If you are looking for a therapist within New York, or somewhere else, you can use the Psychology Today search options. * PSYCHOTHERAPISTS, PSYCHOLOGISTS, PSYCHOANALYSTS AND PSYCHIATRISTS, IT'S ALL SO CONFUSING, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? As a licensed psychotherapist practicing in New York City, this is a frequently asked question and all clients seeking mental health services should understand what these levels of training actually mean. Many therapy group practices charge normal or high fees to work with pre-licensed or newly-licensed therapists who are undergoing supervision to earn their 3000 mandatory hours. This means that as a newly-licensed therapist, they are unable to work autonomously in private practice and must work under a licensed professional. Your therapist or counselor will need to discuss your case at weekly meetings with their supervising therapist. I believe this practice should be disclosed to individuals who are seeking therapy because they are likely unaware of this now common practice. You have the right to ask questions and know the status or experience level of your provider. I graduated from NYU Masters of Social Work Program which enables me, as a licensed clinical social worker, to practice psychotherapy autonomously in private practice. As an LCSW, my license provides for diagnostic and counseling privileges. In addition to my graduate training, I have receive and trained extensively and intensively for over a decade in many other areas so that I could offer more skills to assist healing. A psychotherapist is a licensed mental health professional who may have an MD, Master’s or Doctoral degree and uses “talk therapy” as well as somatic-based approaches to help people experience and understand their emotional lives. Psychotherapists may be psychiatrists, psychologists, licensed clinical social workers, counselors and marriage and family therapists. They have varying years of foundation training, and some, but not all, go on to receive advanced, post-graduate training in specialized areas. Psychiatrists are MD’s and are able to prescribe medication but may not provide psychotherapy, however some do. Many psychiatrists are trained to provide a range of psychotherapies to assist their patients. CBT Training is a good fit for many psychiatrists to help their clients overcome emotional and behavioral problems. A psychologist has a doctoral degree in philosophy, or PsyD doctoral degree in psychology as a foundation, with a focus on research or clinical. They may or may not have received additional training in specialized therapeutic methods beyond what they learned in graduate school. Some Psychologists work in research, others provide therapy. Psychoanalysts have been through an extensive training experience which includes their own psychoanalysis or psychological exploration. They help people develop awareness of unconscious aspects of the mind. Some training institutes are allowing individuals with any graduate degree (law, history, as examples) study psychoanalysis and become a psychoanalyst which allows them to provide mental health care. You may not know whether your therapist has had their own therapy, it’s a question that you can ask. It makes sense that a therapist should understand their own thoughts, feelings and motivations before helping others. Individual therapy is not mandated for mental health providers. * I'VE TRIED "TALK" THERAPY AND WOULD LIKE SOMETHING DIFFERENT. I'VE HEARD ABOUT EMDR, WHAT'S IT LIKE? As a specialist in trauma-focused therapy and an advanced EMDR practitioner, I help people heal from traumatic experiences using EMDR and other helpful somatic-based therapies. If you have faced episodic distress or traumatic events, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing or EMDR focuses on lessening those traumatic memories to minimize negative emotions and physiological triggers. Eye Movement Desensitization & Reprocessing or EMDR, is a psychotherapy approach discovered by Francine Shapiro, that demonstrates we can heal from psychological and emotional wounds, limitations, obstacles and blocks. EMDR therapy identifies and addresses experiences that have overwhelmed the brain’s natural coping capacity and resilience, which has led to traumatic symptoms and harmful coping mechanisms, thus helping clients reprocess traumatic information leading to a more peaceful and integrated resolution. Negative, painful thoughts and beliefs are replaced with more adaptive and realistic “here and now” perceptions and self-concepts. EMDR treatment is based on the neuroscience of the brain and uses the technique of bilateral stimulation to process through memory networks and release the emotional charge associated with distressing thoughts, memories and blocks. The theoretical model underlying EMDR is called the Adaptive Information Processing Model (AIP), which posits that there are events in our lives that may be overwhelming, terrifying, traumatic or otherwise distressful that get “stuck” in our brain impacting our nervous system. These “stuck” experiences may lead to distressing physical and psychological symptoms. EMDR therapy addresses the root cause of distress and suffering and releases trauma held in the body, thus healing the nervous system. As such, clients have a better chance of leading a symptom-reduced life. Compared to traditional forms of therapy such as cognitive behavioral therapy or CBT, EMDR has proven to be more effective as a healing modality because it addresses the root cause of distressful symptoms. Clients utilizing EMDR appear to have less chance of their problems returning in the future after treatment is complete, because healing is believed to take place at the level of the nervous system. EMDR has been broadly studied and has been proven to be effective by extensive research. EMDR is a researched and evidenced-based form of therapy. EMDR is now accepted as a treatment of choice by trauma organizations and mental health organizations around the world. EMDR has been approved as an effective treatment for PTSD by the respected American Psychological Association, American Psychiatric Association, The Department of Defense and the Veteran's Administration, The International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies, The World Health Organization, and more. EMDR is highly-researched, and has the validation of the American Psychological Association, the American Psychiatric Association, the Department of Defense and the Veteran’s Administration, as it relates to treatments for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD. People who have participated in performance enhancement therapy such as competitive athletes and performers often report that they are more self-confident and that unconscious blocks to performance are greatly reduced. In short, EMDR therapy targets disturbing memories and events that have lead to depression, anxiety, phobias, avoidance, addictions, performance problems, impaired functioning, and other symptoms of trauma utilizing the principles of neuroscience. * DO YOU OFFER VIRTUAL THERAPY SESSIONS AND IS ONLINE PSYCHOTHERAPY AS EFFECTIVE AS IN-PERSON THERAPY? According to recent research, remote therapy is just as effective as face-to-face psychotherapy sessions. It may not be your preference, and that’s a personal choice, but is has been show to help people in the same way as in-office sessions. Virtual video therapy sessions (teletherapy, telehealth, telemedicine, online therapy) and phone therapy are effective even if we’ve never met in-person. it's not just individual therapy that works remotely, but online therapy can effectively be used when working with families and couples. It's especially helpful for couples who seek marital and relationship counseling and are in different locations. For years, I have worked virtually with individuals who have never been to my manhattan therapy office. Many begin with office therapy but may move to a different location and wish to keep their therapist. At some point, you may wish to have psychotherapy sessions in-person and that's often an option. Some clients who are high-profile have a greater need for privacy and discretion, they enjoy the relative anonymity by avoiding waiting rooms or being seen entering a medical/therapy suite. Teletherapy has advanced the delivery of mental health care services. It makes mental health resources easier for people to obtain, which is important considering how scarce these resources are in our society. Many of my psychotherapy patients are unable to travel to my New York City office because of work, family or geographical constraints. Teletherapy is also helpful for shy, avoidant and socially anxious individuals who struggle to reach out or engage with therapists. Online therapy is a great option for people who live far away from quality mental health professionals and therapists. Or they may be in need of specialized care. Of course, many New Yorkers struggle to make time for therapy sessions because they are busy and over-scheduled. Telehealth is convenient and flexible for those individuals who have lifestyle demands that make commuting to therapy impossible. It's important to state that teletherapy is not for everyone. Individuals with serious mental illness are better served meeting their mental health professional in an office setting. That said, remote therapy may be better than no therapy for many. Research tells us that virtual or online therapy is just as effective as face-to-face sessions, and if you need therapy and your schedule or lifestyle demands makes commuting a barrier to treatment, then online therapy is the best option for you. According to the American Telemedicine Association, “telehealth has been backed by decades of research and has been found to be a safe and cost-effective way to extend the delivery of health care.” When I first began working with my New York City psychotherapy clients remotely, video or phone, it was purely out of necessity and client convenience. I’ve had clients move to different states, even countries, leave for college or need to be at home during medical or cancer treatment. Video or phone sessions allows for the continuity of care and continued therapeutic support when it is a challenge to meet in the office. Online therapy also works for clients who commute and may experience inclement weather. For many clients, the idea of starting over with a new therapist feels hard, and some will discontinue treatment altogether. Online therapy and counseling has been a helpful option for many clients who wish to continue treatment with their existing therapist. Overall, I have had very positive experiences and feel better about it with many advances in technology. Teletherapy can take place from home, your office and even your car—wherever you feel that you can relax and have privacy. 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