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TIPS FOR TALKING TO KIDS ABOUT TRAGEDY IN THE NEWS

By Common Sense Media Tinybeans Voices Contributor
May 25, 2022
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No matter how old your kids are, threatening or upsetting news can affect them
emotionally. Many can feel worried, frightened, angry, or even guilty. And these
anxious feelings can last long after the news event is over. So what can you do
as a parent to help your kids deal with all this information? Here are a few
tips for talking to kids about tragedy in the news.

 




ADDRESSING NEWS AND CURRENT EVENTS: TIPS FOR ALL KIDS

Consider your own reactions. Your kids will look to the way you handle the news
to determine their own approach. If you stay calm and rational, they will, too.

Take action. Depending on the issue and kids’ ages, families can find ways to
help those affected by the news. Kids can write postcards to politicians
expressing their opinions; families can attend meetings or protests; kids can
help assemble care packages or donate a portion of their allowance to a
rescue/humanitarian effort. Check out websites that help kids do good.

 


TIPS FOR KIDS UNDER 7

Keep the news away. Turn off the TV and radio news at the top of the hour and
half hour. Read the newspaper out of range of young eyes that can be frightened
by the pictures (kids may respond strongly to pictures of other kids in
jeopardy). Preschool kids don’t need to see or hear about something that will
only scare them silly, especially because they can easily confuse facts with
fantasies or fears.

Stress that your family is safe. At this age, kids are most concerned with your
safety and separation from you. Try not to minimize or discount their concerns
and fears, but reassure them by explaining all the protective measures that
exist to keep them safe. If the news event happened far away, you can use the
distance to reassure kids. For kids who live in areas where crime and violence
is a very real threat, any news account of violence may trigger extra fear. If
that happens, share a few age-appropriate tips for staying and feeling safe
(being with an adult, keeping away from any police activity).

Be together. Though it’s important to listen and not belittle their fears,
distraction and physical comfort can go a long way. Snuggling up and watching
something cheery or doing something fun together may be more effective than
logical explanations about probabilities.

 


TIPS FOR KIDS 8–12

Carefully consider your child’s maturity and temperament. Many kids can handle a
discussion of threatening events, but if your kids tend toward the sensitive
side, be sure to keep them away from the TV news; repetitive images and stories
can make dangers appear greater, more prevalent, and closer to home.

Be available for questions and conversation. At this age, many kids will see the
morality of events in stark black-and-white terms and are in the process of
developing their moral beliefs. You may have to explain the basics of prejudice,
bias, and civil and religious strife. But be careful about making
generalizations, since kids will take what you say to the bank. This is a good
time to ask them what they know, since they’ll probably have gotten their
information from friends, and you may have to correct facts.

Talk about — and filter — news coverage. You might explain that even news
programs compete for viewers, which sometimes affects content decisions. If you
let your kids use the Internet, go online with them. Some of the pictures posted
are simply grisly. Monitor where your kids are going, and set your URLs to open
to non-news-based portals.

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TIPS FOR TEENS

Check in. Since, in many instances, teens will have absorbed the news
independently of you, talking with them can offer great insights into their
developing politics and their senses of justice and morality. It will also help
you get a sense of what they already know or have learned about the
situation from their own social networks. It will also give you the opportunity
to throw your own insights into the mix (just don’t dismiss theirs, since that
will shut down the conversation immediately).

Let teens express themselves. Many teens will feel passionately about events and
may even personalize them if someone they know has been directly affected.
They’ll also probably be aware that their own lives could be affected
by violence. Try to address their concerns without dismissing or minimizing
them. If you disagree with media portrayals, explain why so your teens can
separate the mediums through which they absorb news from the messages conveyed.

 


ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

For more information on how to talk to your kids about a recent tragedy, please
visit the National Association of School Psychologists or the American
Psychological Association. For more on how news can impact kids, check out News
and America’s Kids: How Young People Perceive and Are Impacted by the News,

Marie-Louise Mares, Associate Professor in the Department of Communication Arts
at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, contributed to this article.




COMMON SENSE MEDIA

Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Common Sense Media is an independent nonprofit organization offering unbiased
ratings and trusted advice to help families make smart media and technology
choices. Check out our ratings and recommendations at www.commonsense.org.

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 * current events
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 * violence
 * maturity
 * suicide
 * violent
 * separation
 * politics

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