www.fmylife.com
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Submitted URL: http://www.fmylife.com/
Effective URL: https://www.fmylife.com/
Submission: On February 21 via api from US — Scanned from DE
Effective URL: https://www.fmylife.com/
Submission: On February 21 via api from US — Scanned from DE
Form analysis
3 forms found in the DOMGET /search
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GET /search
<form class="lg:mt-0 lg:w-64 w-full lg:ml-5 relative" role="search" action="/search" method="get">
<div class="relative mt-0 rounded-md">
<input type="text" name="expr" class="block w-full rounded-md border-0 py-1.5 pr-10 text-gray-900 placeholder:text-gray-400 sm:text-sm opacity-75 focus:opacity-100" placeholder="Search" value="">
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POST /article-submit
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<div class="flex items-center mt-8">
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<option value="4">Enby</option>
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<div class="w-full mt-4">
<label class="sr-only" for="email">Email</label>
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<div class="mt-8">
<textarea id="article-content" name="article-content" class="w-full rounded-lg border p-2 text-sm border-gray-300 dark:bg-dark-500" rows="5" placeholder="Today, … FML" required=""></textarea>
<p class="mb-4"> Remaining characters: <span id="article-content-remaining-chars">320</span>
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<p id="guidelines" class="hidden p-4 bg-gray-100 text-gray-600 border border-gray-300 rounded mt-2 mb-8">Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of
either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop
believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.</p>
<div>
<label>
<input type="checkbox" name="anonymous"> Make me anonymous </label>
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<hr class="border-pink-500 dark:border-white my-8">
<div class="flex flex-col md:flex-row items-center justify-between">
<p>
<a class="text-blue-300 dark:text-white" data-collapse="guidelines" href="#collapse-guidelines" aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="collapseExample">
<i class="fa fa-file"></i>
Please read our guidelines for posting
</a><br>
<label class="items-center">
<input type="checkbox" name="tos" class="mr-1">
<span class="text-orange-500 dark:text-white">I have read and accepted the </span>
<a class="text-blue-300" target="_blank" href="/termsofservice">
terms and conditions
</a>
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<button type="submit" class="submit-btn submit-article-footer">
<div class="loader"></div>
<div class="submit-text">Submit</div>
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<input name="first-name" type="hidden">
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Text Content
WE VALUE YOUR PRIVACY We and our partners store and/or access information on a device, such as cookies and process personal data, such as unique identifiers and standard information sent by a device for personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, and audience insights, as well as to develop and improve products. With your permission we and our partners may use precise geolocation data and identification through device scanning. You may click to consent to our and our 793 partners’ processing as described above. Alternatively you may access more detailed information and change your preferences before consenting or to refuse consenting. Please note that some processing of your personal data may not require your consent, but you have a right to object to such processing. Your preferences will apply to this website only. You can change your preferences at any time by returning to this site or visit our privacy policy. MORE OPTIONSAGREE FML for mobile Free Open in app × -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- search Categories All -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Random -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Spicy -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nearly FMLs -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Top -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- FML - The Follow-Up FML Submit Moderate Account Log in Submit your FML Moderate the FMLs Log in All Random Spicy Random Spicy The Top FML - The Follow-Up Nearly FMLs search Submit your FML × Have you just experienced an FML moment? Feel like sharing it with the other FML users? Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your name Gender Gender Male Female Other Enby TransFem TransMasc Email Remaining characters: 320 Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft. Make me anonymous -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Please read our guidelines for posting I have read and accepted the terms and conditions Submit ALL THE FMLS HELPER BLUES By Fat and Embarrassed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Palmdale Today, I asked an elderly customer at my work if she needed help with her groceries. She responded, "I normally would, but I'm afraid you'll eat all the groceries." FML I agree, your life sucks 12 801 You deserved it 1 366 Share Tweet Share BLACK BALLED By Don't complain about good fortune - 20/02/2024 17:00 - United States Today, my wife somehow found out that my "surprise bonus" from earlier this year was actually hush money from my boss to keep quiet about her affair. Rather than let a good thing alone, she threw a fit and called my boss's husband. Now I'm jobless, and my boss has sworn I'll never work in my industry again. FML I agree, your life sucks 115 You deserved it 48 Share Tweet Share BEEN THERE, CAN'T DO THAT By Anonymous - 21/02/2024 01:00 - United Arab Emirates - Sharjah Today, I feel like I made the worst choice of my life and I have to pay the consequences, and I seriously feel like shit. I need help. Moving abroad to study at 30 was the worst mistake and I hate my life here. I want to go back but I lost everything back home and I don't have anything here. I'm stuck; I just want to be happy. FML I agree, your life sucks 136 You deserved it 63 Share Tweet Share SKITTISH By bronzemedal97 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I was leaning under a counter to get my girlfriend her favorite snack food out of a low cabinet when she decided it would be funny to poke me while I was in an awkward position. I jerked up, rammed my head on the bottom of the counter, and ended up at the ER with staples in my head. FML I agree, your life sucks 48 782 You deserved it 3 258 Share Tweet Share MORTIFYING By Creeper - 20/02/2024 16:00 - United States - Seattle Today, I accidentally liked my ex's new partner's photo while stalking them on social media. Now I have to decide between pretending it never happened if they happened to notice, or sending a fruit basket with a note that says, "Sorry for the accidental like. It's not you; it's muscle memory." FML I agree, your life sucks 31 You deserved it 305 Share Tweet Share OPEN QUESTION By Anonymous - 20/02/2024 06:00 - Canada - Calgary Today, I've been wondering if it's a red flag for an almost 40 year-old dude to have never been in a serious relationship. Is it? FML I agree, your life sucks 188 You deserved it 119 Share Tweet Share BRAIN WORMS By Anonymous - 20/02/2024 12:00 - Australia Today, I realized I've been saying "Excuse me" to automatic sliding doors for the past week. They haven't responded yet, but I'll keep you posted on their social skills. FML I agree, your life sucks 172 You deserved it 84 Share Tweet Share SUPPORT SYSTEM By Anonymous - 20/02/2024 03:00 - United States - South Park Township Today, I found out that I have a heart disease. When I went to tell my family, they all said that it should kill me faster so that I can donate my organs to my cousin. FML I agree, your life sucks 398 You deserved it 49 Share Tweet Share NEVER CROSS THE STREAMS By FiredAF - 20/02/2024 00:00 - United States Today, I was emailing my department about a huge meeting we’re going to have. I was also emailing back and forth with another colleague about office gossip. I absentmindedly replied to the wrong email. I hit reply all to the meeting e-mail, saying that the new supervisor of X department was "so fucking retarded." FML I agree, your life sucks 47 You deserved it 765 Share Tweet Share FREAKOUT! By beer guy - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff Today, I got punched in the back by elderly woman because she thought I was mocking the way she walked as I passed her. I was walking funny because I have a brace-boot on my foot due to the fact that it got run over. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 360 You deserved it 2 534 Share Tweet Share BELIEF IT OR NOT By Anonymous - 19/02/2024 23:00 Today, every boyfriend I’ve ever had dumped me because they realised I was serious about saving myself until marriage. I’m now in my late 30s, single, and childless. My sister, whose knickers were up and down like a yo-yo in high school, is happily married with 3 great kids. Religion is for idiots. FML I agree, your life sucks 235 You deserved it 833 Share Tweet Share BUMBLING By Jane - 19/02/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom Today, during an interview, in my nervousness I accidentally handed the interviewer an A4 paper with my doodles and a grocery list instead of my resume. I guess they now know I need to buy more milk and have a questionable talent for drawing stick figures. FML I agree, your life sucks 231 You deserved it 171 Share Tweet Share RUNNING LATE By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 974 You deserved it 3 851 Share Tweet Share MOM OF THE YEAR By Bianca - 19/02/2024 09:00 - United States Today, my car’s at the mechanic's so I called my mom and asked her to come pick me up from class, since it ends at 9pm and I was scared to walk home at night. She told me, “Oh honey, you have nothing to worry about, you’re too fat to get raped, plus you need the exercise.” FML I agree, your life sucks 524 You deserved it 131 Share Tweet Share IT'S ALL SUBJECTIVE By Anonymous - 19/02/2024 05:00 - United States Today, I took my girlfriend to a beginners’ painting class. She and everyone else was able to produce a painting significantly better than mine, and I got laughed at for my lack of skill. I’ve been painting for twenty-five years. FML I agree, your life sucks 362 You deserved it 157 Share Tweet Share SENSITIVE By Anonymous - 19/02/2024 08:00 Today, even though I told my son I had vegan burgers for him, he brought enough vegan food for everyone at a barbecue, and tried to get everyone to try it. Not one person ate a damn bit of it, and he’s now crying, all while blocking our drive with his car. FML I agree, your life sucks 486 You deserved it 169 Share Tweet Share STACKS By Anonymous - 19/02/2024 05:00 Today, and since New Year's Day, my husband has instituted a lateness jar. I have to put £1 in every time my “pissing about getting ready makes us more than 10 minutes late.” I really tried to embarrass him with how empty it would be, but he counted it today. It’s only mid February and it’s already over £100. FML I agree, your life sucks 78 You deserved it 861 Share Tweet Share THE GOOD OLD DAYS By FBfail - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom Today, I saw my boyfriend of two years had joined a group on Facebook called "Guys who are proud of their girlfriends". I smiled and was about to like it when I noticed a comment below from a girl saying, "Awww thanks babe :) xxxx." FML I agree, your life sucks 43 119 You deserved it 3 073 Share Tweet Share THE BLAME GAME By Anonymous - 18/02/2024 17:00 - United States Today, I got bad food poisoning. Again. The first time I thought it was the stomach bug that’s going around, so once I felt better, I proceeded to eat leftover food that actually got me sick the first time. FML I agree, your life sucks 128 You deserved it 551 Share Tweet Share ARTWORK By willbo - 18/02/2024 13:00 - United States Today, my roommate sent me a picture of his shit. I don’t know what’s worse, the caption saying “3 lbs” or the fact that it was all one gigantic piece. FML I agree, your life sucks 361 You deserved it 67 Share Tweet Share DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY BIRTHDAY By Levi Smith - 18/02/2024 13:00 - United States - Assaria Today, happy birthday to me. Any calls from my friends? Nope. Socials? Not even one. My wife and daughter spent any time with me? Couldn’t even be bothered to put their phones down during dinner. Not a single person on God’s green earth gives a shit about me. FML I agree, your life sucks 503 You deserved it 119 Share Tweet Share YOU OK UP THERE? By hurtsmyears - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I had to endure yet another evening of the old man in the apartment above me screaming, "No, I don't want to shave my nose hair, you crazy bitch." He lives alone. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 661 You deserved it 2 431 Share Tweet Share GET ME OUT OF HERE By Shawn - 18/02/2024 06:00 - United States - Bellingham Today, I have polymyositis. A muscle disease. Pretty advanced. I'm only able to work a few hours a week. In 2018 my roommate assaulted me in a drunken blackout. My boss moved me into her windowless garage. She and her husband run a catering business. They steal card tips, and cheat on their taxes. I have nowhere else to go. FML I agree, your life sucks 469 You deserved it 68 Share Tweet Share PRACTICE RUN By Oops - 18/02/2024 05:00 - United States - Steele Today, I went to console my cousin because I'd heard that her dog had passed away. As I opened the door, the first thing I saw was her extremely old and feeble (but still very much alive) dog. Turns out my friend was talking about HIS cousin, and I simply misheard. Trying to explain that to her was mighty awkward. FML I agree, your life sucks 293 You deserved it 136 Share Tweet Share MISOPHONIA By Anonymous - 18/02/2024 02:00 - United States - Montgomery Today, while eating breakfast in a hotel lobby, the woman next to me started playing an obnoxious clip of a baby’s high-pitched crying. The worst part is that my parents refused to let me do anything about it or step away from the loud noise, as they thought it would “embarrass the whole family.” FML I agree, your life sucks 416 You deserved it 93 Share Tweet Share HOW COULD YOU? By Anonymous - 18/02/2024 05:00 Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks found out she was 2 months pregnant with her ex's baby. I of course broke up with her because I don’t need exes drama or babies in my life. My mother called me an atrocious human being for not staying with her after only three weeks to raise another dude's kid. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 016 You deserved it 126 Share Tweet Share A TAD INSECURE By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Anchorage Today, I confronted my girlfriend over how she and a male friend have been going out together, drinking and partying, and at one point holding hands in the street. She angrily accused ME of cheating, because "confronting people like that" is apparently something only cheaters themselves do. FML I agree, your life sucks 51 784 You deserved it 5 120 Share Tweet Share ATTITUDE By Anonymous - 17/02/2024 15:00 - United States - Port Orchard Today, I've decided that I am destined to be unhappy. I seem to get too invested in the ones who don't care. Including my current marriage, which is inevitably doomed no matter how much effort I put into it. FML I agree, your life sucks 330 You deserved it 156 Share Tweet Share RURAL CHARM By jlc82 - 17/02/2024 15:00 - United States Today, the most exciting thing going on in my hometown is a that cow escaped its slaughterhouse transport, only to be put down by our highway patrol. He's got his own Facebook page and everything. Welcome to Ohio. FML I agree, your life sucks 340 You deserved it 109 Share Tweet Share FIGURE IT OUT By brosef - 17/02/2024 11:00 - United States Today, I'm a guy who's always been physically a late bloomer. In high school, I looked too young for girls to like me. At 22, I still looked 17. Now at 25, I look good but when girls find out my age, they expect me to have everything figured out by now. I never got to be young. FML I agree, your life sucks 311 You deserved it 186 Share Tweet Share * 1 * 2 * 3 * 4 * 5 * 6 * 7 * 8 * 9 * 10 * Keywords Healthy Lifestyle Food Social Media Money Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Music Animals Dogs Cute Work Teenagers Kids Weird Job interview Farts My ex Love Stalker Mental health Health Relatable Relationship advice Intimacy Sex Students Art Cheating Poopoo peepee The Top Today, my mother mentioned she thought I was Unit 11, and not the correct Unit 1, in my building. I then remembered my last anonymous Valentine’s Day card was addressed to me, but at Unit 11. So my “Secret Admirer” of many years is actually my mother taking pity on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 526 You deserved it 98 Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML I agree, your life sucks 351 You deserved it 1 987 See the Top FMLs The Top Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML I agree, your life sucks 40 866 You deserved it 14 309 Today, I walked in on my boyfriend watching a home made sex tape he had previously made with his ex-girlfriend. What's worse than him jerking off to it? He was crying and hugging a pillow. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 235 You deserved it 3 104 Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML I agree, your life sucks 72 310 You deserved it 5 798 Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 735 You deserved it 15 743 Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML I agree, your life sucks 42 040 You deserved it 5 009 Today, my girlfriend's 8-year-old daughter decided that I'm going to marry her mom and send her to an orphanage. I blurted out, "Marriage?! No one's talking about marriage!" Now my girlfriend is mad at me, and her daughter is still scared of me. 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