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‘I know I need more information and support, but in the meantime it only takes
two clicks to have the promise of facial plumpness.’ Illustration: Leonie
Bos/The Guardian
View image in fullscreen
‘I know I need more information and support, but in the meantime it only takes
two clicks to have the promise of facial plumpness.’ Illustration: Leonie
Bos/The Guardian
Halfway there: a column about midlifeWell actually



MENOPAUSE TESTS AND ANTI-AGEING FACE OILS: WELCOME TO MIDLIFE CONSUMERISM

In the last two years I’ve spent $1,000 on skincare products. I tell myself I’m
not trying to ‘extend my youth span’ – but what am I doing when I buy these
products?


Angela Garbes
Thu 8 Aug 2024 13.00 BST
Share



During my teens, I hated my skin. Puberty made zits and oily skin inevitable.
But as I got older, my pimples faded, my skin was always smooth, and my face
never turned pink and splotchy in the sun. With minimal effort – a gentle wash
most nights, moisturizer with SPF most days – my face stayed clear, moist and an
even golden brown.

“It’s because I’m Asian,” I’d say jokingly when people complimented me. At 35,
at 40, my skin continued to glow. It was the one physical feature people
regularly gave me positive, unsolicited feedback on, and I felt smug.



But these days my skin feels anything but dewy and smooth. Four years of
perimenopause have brought uneven pigmentation and dry skin. Pores, freckles and
wrinkles rise like mountains on the topographical map of my face. During hot
summers when I spend much of my time outside and sweating, a harmless fungal
infection – tinea versicolor, caused by an overgrowth of yeast – causes white
patches to bloom over my cheeks and forehead.

This summer, I went on a camping road trip with my family: coated in sunscreen
during the day, sprayed down with potent insect repellent in the late
afternoons, not showering or bathing, and lying in an unwashed sleeping bag on
the ground at night. It was filthy, glorious fun. And it absolutely exacerbated
all my skin issues.

It’s challenging to witness a favorite aspect of my appearance morph into
something I find unattractive. I am trying to love and accept my body, but
goddamnit, I want the youthful-looking skin I’ve grown accustomed to – and the
compliments that accompany it!

In the last two years I have spent close to $1,000 on skincare products: an
exfoliating rice polish, an anti-ageing facial oil called Prevent, two different
tinted SPF lotions, an ultra-thick night cream, a “resurfacing” night serum, and
a “skin serum” body wash which promises to nurture my natural microbiome and
hydrate my desiccated flesh. I massage my neck and face with a jade gua sha tool
a few mornings a week in the hopes of de-puffing my face, draining my lymph
nodes or sculpting my cheeks and jawline.

Around the same time I started my purchasing spree, I began seeing the stylist
Stacy London, who I’d spent hundreds of hours watching on What Not to Wear, all
over my Instagram feed. She was talking about midlife and menopause – and
recommending products to buy. (London was CEO of State of Menopause, a wellness
company that no longer sells merchandise.)

In 2022 the Cut reported that “the business of menopause is projected to be a
$600bn market by 2025”.

> I am actively involved in consumerism, triggered by my insecurities

“Gen X is not interested in being middle-aged,” London told the Cut. “We have
Botox, we have fillers, we go to the gym, we walk 10,000 steps, we’re going to
live to be 90, so we are not making middle age a thing. We’re going to just
extend our youth span.”

I bristled at London’s words – but I have to face facts. I tell myself I am not
trying to “extend my youth span”, but what is it exactly that I am doing when I
buy these items?

I’ve now noticed a glut of menopause products, advertisements and even
menopausal celebrities. Weeks after seeing a television commercial for the
Clearblue Menopause Stage Indicator Test – a series of pee-on-a-stick pregnancy
tests, but for menopause – I saw one at my local drug store and
impulse-purchased it. Friends began texting me about Naomi Watts and the “Vag of
Honor” lubricant sold through Stripes, her brand of “science-backed” beauty
products and supplements “using natural sustainable ingredients”.

There is a very real tension between the biological needs we have as we age and
the cynical eagerness of the market to sell us piles of stuff. Sometimes I am
certain I can feel these forces chafing against each other in my brain and body,
grinding me down to dusty bits. When many doctors remain under-informed about
how best to care for perimenopausal patients, it’s easy to see why. I know I
need more information and support, but in the meantime it only takes two clicks
to have the promise of facial plumpness.

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It’s easy to say, as I often do, that it’s capitalism at work. Yet I am actively
involved in consumerism, triggered by my insecurities.

I try my best to approach menopause as a life transition similar to puberty.
It’s an awkward phase for sure – an abundance of fluids, surprisingly tender
bits, new soft protrusions, a dermatological mess – but one preparing me for the
years of life to come. These are normal body transitions, not medical problems
that require “fixing”.

I hate that it feels contradictory to want to age “naturally” while also wanting
to feel positive about my appearance. I was taught that vanity is bad, that I
shouldn’t spend time focusing on how I look. My self-esteem is rooted in my
internal sense of self, knowing that I am enough exactly as I am – and no serum
can give me that. But does it need to preclude feeling attractive, even
occasionally hot?

I spent the better part of my life feeling low-key bad to punishingly terrible
about my body. At this point I can afford, both emotionally and financially, to
indulge and invest in how I look. I can buy some products without losing my
inherent sense of self or a hold on my values. But every time I look in the
mirror, I’m aware that it’s a fine line.

Explore more on these topics
 * Well actually
 * Halfway there: a column about midlife
 * Ageing
 * Skincare
 * Beauty
 * features

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