andreasmoser.blog
Open in
urlscan Pro
192.0.78.25
Public Scan
Submitted URL: http://andreasmoser.blog/
Effective URL: https://andreasmoser.blog/
Submission Tags: tranco_l324
Submission: On June 01 via api from DE — Scanned from DE
Effective URL: https://andreasmoser.blog/
Submission Tags: tranco_l324
Submission: On June 01 via api from DE — Scanned from DE
Form analysis 3 forms found in the DOM
POST https://subscribe.wordpress.com
<form action="https://subscribe.wordpress.com" method="post" accept-charset="utf-8" data-blog="15688790" data-post_access_level="everybody" id="subscribe-blog">
<p>Enter your e-mail address to follow this blog and receive new posts by e-mail. It\'s free!</p>
<p id="subscribe-email">
<label id="subscribe-field-label" for="subscribe-field" class="screen-reader-text"> Email Address: </label>
<input type="email" name="email" style="width: 95%; padding: 1px 10px" placeholder="Email Address" value="" id="subscribe-field" required="">
</p>
<p id="subscribe-submit">
<input type="hidden" name="action" value="subscribe">
<input type="hidden" name="blog_id" value="15688790">
<input type="hidden" name="source" value="https://andreasmoser.blog/">
<input type="hidden" name="sub-type" value="widget">
<input type="hidden" name="redirect_fragment" value="subscribe-blog">
<input type="hidden" id="_wpnonce" name="_wpnonce" value="7b23580ce4"> <button type="submit" class="wp-block-button__link"> Follow </button>
</p>
</form>POST https://subscribe.wordpress.com
<form method="post" action="https://subscribe.wordpress.com" accept-charset="utf-8" style="display: none;">
<div class="actnbr-follow-count">Join 3,392 other subscribers</div>
<div>
<input type="email" name="email" placeholder="Enter your email address" class="actnbr-email-field" aria-label="Enter your email address">
</div>
<input type="hidden" name="action" value="subscribe">
<input type="hidden" name="blog_id" value="15688790">
<input type="hidden" name="source" value="https://andreasmoser.blog/">
<input type="hidden" name="sub-type" value="actionbar-follow">
<input type="hidden" id="_wpnonce" name="_wpnonce" value="7b23580ce4">
<div class="actnbr-button-wrap">
<button type="submit" value="Sign me up"> Sign me up </button>
</div>
</form><form id="jp-carousel-comment-form">
<label for="jp-carousel-comment-form-comment-field" class="screen-reader-text">Write a Comment...</label>
<textarea name="comment" class="jp-carousel-comment-form-field jp-carousel-comment-form-textarea" id="jp-carousel-comment-form-comment-field" placeholder="Write a Comment..."></textarea>
<div id="jp-carousel-comment-form-submit-and-info-wrapper">
<div id="jp-carousel-comment-form-commenting-as">
<fieldset>
<label for="jp-carousel-comment-form-email-field">Email</label>
<input type="text" name="email" class="jp-carousel-comment-form-field jp-carousel-comment-form-text-field" id="jp-carousel-comment-form-email-field">
</fieldset>
<fieldset>
<label for="jp-carousel-comment-form-author-field">Name</label>
<input type="text" name="author" class="jp-carousel-comment-form-field jp-carousel-comment-form-text-field" id="jp-carousel-comment-form-author-field">
</fieldset>
<fieldset>
<label for="jp-carousel-comment-form-url-field">Website</label>
<input type="text" name="url" class="jp-carousel-comment-form-field jp-carousel-comment-form-text-field" id="jp-carousel-comment-form-url-field">
</fieldset>
</div>
<input type="submit" name="submit" class="jp-carousel-comment-form-button" id="jp-carousel-comment-form-button-submit" value="Post Comment">
</div>
</form>Text Content
THE HAPPY HERMIT
Hot-shot lawyer when necessary. Hitchhiking hobo as often as I can.
Skip to content
* Home
* About me
* Travels
* My Next Trips
* FAQ on my Life as a Traveler
* Contact
* Support this Blog
* Do you want a postcard?
* Books: My wishlist
* Surprise!
← Older posts
TWO LESSONS FROM THE LAST BILDERBERG CONFERENCE
Posted on 2024-05-13 by Andreas Moser
Zur deutschen Fassung.
Ever since I returned to practice law, I get invited to all sorts of fancy
events. Usually, I neither care much about them, nor do I have the time.
But when I saw the name of the place where the Bar Association of Saxony held
its annual reception, it was clear that this was a coded invitation to the most
exclusive club of the world. So I did show up.
Looking at my attire, I really don’t understand why they double- and
triple-checked my credentials. (I mean, I have come a long way from my hobo
days.) But in the end, I managed to charm my way inside.
You may not have heard much about the Bilderberg conference. In fact, you
shouldn’t have, because it is top secret. No photos, no quotes, nothing. You
don’t even swap business cards.
But, as I usually get invited to anything only once, I have nothing to fear
anyway. So, I am going to spill two of the most important lessons I took away
from the conversation with a fellow lawyer.
Lesson one:
He told me how he had once been extremely close to a burnout and had taken a few
days off over New Year’s, to reflect on his options and to decide whether to
continue in that field. He came to the conclusion that it was really just a
handful of clients that caused all the stress and the headache. The rest were
okay, some of them even nice.
When he returned to the office, he sent a letter to all the annoying clients,
telling them that he no longer wished to work with them.
Sure, he lost business and revenue. But he regained joy and energy and peace of
mind. After all, there are more important things in life than work and money.
He went on to give me his most important advice. Once a quarter, he goes through
his list of open cases, firing the most annoying 10% of the clients. Because
like in most other businesses, it’s a few clients who cause most of the
headache. (And they are probably the ones who don’t even bring in much revenue.)
Funnily, clients are often surprised when I terminate my relationship with them.
“You can’t do that,” they exclaim, apparently in the erroneous belief that they
have hired me for life. I even know lawyers who aren’t aware of that possibility
and believe that once they accepted a case, they have to stick it out.
Obviously, with experience you get pretty good at identifying such people before
you take them on. In life and in business, the word “no” should be used as often
as possible. But, like in relationships, some people seem nice at the beginning,
and their darker sides only becomes apparent over time.
Lesson two:
As we were standing at the dessert buffet, the same lawyer told me about
Quarkkeulchen, a local Saxon specialty.
These things are an absolute delight. A revelation. A feast of happiness and
yumminess.
Maybe I should combine these two lessons and only accept clients who know how to
cook Quarkkeulchen and a prepare a full platter for our first consultation.
Posted in Economics, Food, Germany, Law | Tagged business, conspiracy, lawyer,
lawyers | 14 Comments
TIME MANAGEMENT: “NO THANKS!”
Posted on 2024-05-06 by Andreas Moser
Time management. To-do lists. Multi-tasking. 24/7 availability. Many of you are
desperately trying many different methods to squeeze more productive time into
your days or weeks, to get more done, and to become more efficient.
Forget about it! You cannot manage time. Time flies. You cannot stop it. And
before you know it, you’ll be dead.
If you feel that you have too much to do, that you are over-worked and close to
a burnout, you need to manage something else than time. You need to manage your
tasks. Because time is a fixed value, it is the amount and the scope of the
tasks accepted by you (or handed to you) which determine how much you work and
how exhausted – or relaxed – you are.
There is only one proven method of “time management”: Do less!
Because of this, the word “no” is the most important management tool.
Most of us instinctively say “yes” when we are asked if we want to do something.
With new tasks come new clients, new responsibilities, more income, more
excitement. Sometimes, it even feels good when people ask you, because it shows
trust in your abilities.
Also, it seems to be socially expected to say “yes” when somebody asks you
something. “Do you want to come to my party?”, “could you help me with this
sales project?” or “would you like to watch my children over the weekend?” If
you say “no”, you will seem anti-social, suspicious, selfish, weird. You may
simply say “yes” out of a reflex or because you don’t want to lose a friend or a
job. You are too afraid to say “no”.
I have developed a few techniques how to deal with this problem:
1. Say “no thanks” instead of “no”. If someone asks you to watch their children
over the weekend and you say “no thanks” in a very nice and genuine way, you
make it sound as if they had offered you a favor but you graciously
declined. I have often experienced that people don’t even know how to react
to that. They just walk away, totally confused. Try it!
2. Another reply I sometimes use is the famous line from Herman Melville’s
Bartleby the Scrivener who coincidentally also works at a law office. When
asked to do something, he politely responds with “I would prefer not to.”
However, I have found this to be less effective than a simple “no thanks”,
as it sometimes elicits the question “why?”
3. Don’t reply at all. This works very well with e-mails, letters and voice
messages (another reason not to answer your phone). Every day, I delete some
of the e-mails I receive from prospective clients without replying to them.
I know I won’t have the time, or I am not interested in their case or they
sound as if they don’t want to pay for my services. You find this impolite?
It isn’t. Nobody has an entitlement to your time. It is your time and you
alone decide what to do with it. You do not owe anything to anybody,
especially not an explanation.
4. Reply late. That’s a less drastic, but very effective version of method no.
3. Reply after a week or after a month. Usually the project will have found
somebody else to do it. Or it will have turned out that it wasn’t that
important after all. You will innocently ask “does this still need to be
done?” and to the reproachful account of how somebody else already completed
the job, you will reply – with a thankful smile – “that’s good, I am happy
to hear that.”
5. I understand that all of this is harder when you are in employment because
you have signed a contract that gives somebody else some control over some
of your time. My first advice therefore is to avoid employment, but I
realize that this is not always possible. When your manager asks you to do
something which you don’t find worth your time, I suggest you reply “Sure I
can do that, but then I cannot work on something else in the same time.
Which other project/client do you wish me to abandon/neglect?” Make sure
that your boss realizes that every hour can only be spent once and that
every task they give you comes at the expense of some other task.
The last point is also an important point for your personal life. You may think
“it doesn’t really cost me much to go to this party which I won’t enjoy, but it
will make other people happy” or “well, it’s only one evening of the week”. But
always remember: Whatever you do, it prevents you from doing something else at
the same time! This something else could be something that you would enjoy much
more. The fancy economic term for this is “opportunity cost”.
Posted in Economics, Life, Philosophy, Time | Tagged business, management | 30
Comments
HOW TO SPEED UP YOUR APPLICATION FOR GERMAN CITIZENSHIP
Posted on 2024-04-04 by Andreas Moser
With the new German citizenship law entering into effect in June 2024, the
number of people applying for naturalization will increase substantially.
For one, you no longer need to give up your primary citizenship. This
requirement, though already riddled with as many holes as a piece of Swiss
cheese caught in the crossfire between two competing cartels, has hitherto
prevented many people from applying, although they would have been eligible
already.
Second, with the standard residence requirement being reduced from 8 years to 5
years, many people have suddenly become eligible for naturalization who
otherwise would have needed to wait for one, two or three more years.
These news have been met with jubilation, but also with dread. Many foreigners
living in Germany, having fully adopted the national pastime of complaining,
quickly voiced concerns that the application process will now take even longer,
that you won’t even get an appointment at the citizenship office, and that in
the end, it will still take years until you receive one of the most useful
passports in the world.
Me being a very untypical German, I don’t like to complain, but to give
constructive advice instead. In this article, you will learn the tricks to speed
up the process of obtaining German citizenship.
First of all, is German bureaucracy really that bad?
No, it’s not.
I get bewildered looks when I make that claim, but do you know how long it takes
to process citizenship applications in your home country? No, you don’t, so let
me tell you: It takes around one year in Australia, 14 months in Canada, and
between 18 and 24 months in the USA.
The processing time in Germany varies between three months and several years. In
the future, it should become quicker, because the whole part about giving up
your primary citizenship (which required cooperation from your home country and
which often slowed down the process considerably) will fall away.
Why the enormous difference in processing times?
There are mainly two reasons for that.
One is the difference between applicants.
Take, for example, an Austrian applicant, who is fluent in Germany, has a steady
job, no criminal record, and who – as an EU citizen – was never required to give
up his/her primary citizenship. Obviously, the caseworker will only need to look
at that file once, approve it, and that’s it. One hour of work.
The next applicant is a man from Russia with a wife from Syria and with three
adopted children from Somalia, Eritrea and Bolivia. They all want to keep their
primary citizenships, each of them arguing specific hardships based on the
situation in their home country. The background checks reveal that the husband
was in the KGB and is sought for plutonium smuggling in Transnistria, to where
he cannot be extradited. The wife’s brother spent 5 years in Guantanamo, which
by itself doesn’t mean that he is guilty of anything, but additional checks are
warranted. As to the adopted children, there are formal and legal problems
regarding each of the adoptions, requiring a new proceeding to get the adoptions
recognized in Germany before the children can be naturalized together with their
parents. Also, the two parents are academics at German universities, and as such
can’t show an uninterrupted work history, because that’s not how academia works.
And – most seriously – they have a criminal record for once having barbecued on
their balcony after 10pm. Obviously, this file will need to be looked at and
attended to at least 30 times. It will require correspondence with 27 different
national and international institutions, each of which is going to take their
time.
The other reason for the difference in processing times is the federal system of
Germany.
In Germany, citizenship law is federal law, but the application of citizenship
law (with exceptions, of course) lies within the purview of the states. The 16
states, all being their own independent entities with their own constitutions
and parliaments and kings and such, have each decided to deal with the
application of federal law in a slightly different manner. Some of the states
carry it out on the state level, but most have delegated it further to counties,
regions or municipalities. This means that in some states, you deal with a large
bureaucracy, while in others, it’s the mayor of your village who approves your
passport if you are a nice guy.
Admittedly, this sounds a bit complicated, but it’s the political system we
inherited from the Holy Roman Empire. The last time somebody tried to change
that, it resulted in the Thirty Years’ War, and therefore ain’t nobody never
gonna touch it again.
But before you complain about this arcane political system, consider that this
is also the reason why Germany has so many castles. If you don’t like it, just
move to a country without castles. Iceland, maybe, or Tuvalu.
Lastly, let’s keep in mind that historically, the world has suffered much more
from German efficiency than from German inefficiency, if you know what I mean.
Well, even if my case is super easy, what can I do if I can’t get an
appointment?
Simply file by mail or electronically.
The decision whether electronic filing is permitted, is of course decided at the
county/municipality level, as explained above. But even when not, you can
download the application form, add all the attachments and mail them in.
I honestly don’t understand why people think that they always need an
appointment for everything. Almost anything can be done by writing or
electronically. Sooner or later, you need to show up in person, for the oath of
allegiance and the compulsory mug of beer, but that’s towards the end of the
process.
By the way, as a lawyer, I can always file electronically, with any government
agency in Germany, because we have our secret intranet, connecting all
government offices, courts, lawyers, notaries, bailiffs, customs, police,
submarines, and so on. So if you want to be fancy and do everything online, just
hire a lawyer. – The only two things where I can’t help electronically: If you
want to get married or if you need to go to prison, you still need to show up in
person. And that should tell you something about the similarity between these
two.
The most important advice when you file for German citizenship
There is one thing you can do to make your application stand out and increase
the likelihood of it being processed faster.
Whether you file in paper or electronically, please only file when you have all
the documents ready. And then, please organize everything neatly.
In the case of filing in paper, put everything in one folder, neatly organized,
numbered and indexed. With a cover sheet that lists all the attachments, what
they are and where they can be found in the folder. And if anything is out of
the ordinary, for example your employment history, or if you need to explain
something in your criminal record, proactively explain it instead of waiting.
If the caseworker receives your documents in a way that he/she can check
immediately that they are complete, he/she might process your application right
away. If, on the other hand, you send a box full of crumpled paper, with some
payslips there, pages of your rental contract there, and a note promising that
you will submit the things which you can’t find right now, among them your birth
certificate and your language exam, then nobody will even bother starting to
work on your application.
“I don’t know what you need, so I just sent you everything I have.”
Same goes for the electronic filing: Only file when you have everything ready.
Make neat scans, not shaky cellphone photos with bad lighting. Save them as PDF
files and give them descriptive names. Birth_certificate_John_Doe_2Jul1973
instead of PIC_3275. If your employment contract has 8 pages, compile them into
one PDF file instead of sending 8 separate files. And same here: Include a cover
letter in which you address all the things that need to be addressed, where a
simple “yes” or “no” on the form does not suffice, as it often won’t.
In my mind, all of this is common courtesy. But sadly, many people seem to have
no experience of working with documents. (You should see the things I receive,
with half of the documents being upside down, blurred, too dark, or where you
can see the pizza in the photo.) Too many people prioritize speed over
thoroughness. That never pays, because it will just lead to more work, more
questions, and more delays.
Maybe I should dispel one myth, speaking of speed: It does not matter when you
apply. The applications are not processed in the order in which they are
received. As the caseworkers are humans, they will first work on the ones that
are easy to process and well organized. Also, it makes sense to lump
applications from the same countries together and work on them in one batch.
And if it really takes too long, you can sue.
Now, we finally come to the famous Untätigkeitsklage.
Having said all of this, there are cases in which the government really does
take too long. Some people have been waiting for several years for their
citizenship application to be processed. And still, they haven’t heard anything.
In this case, you can sue the German government. While you can usually only sue
after your application has been denied, § 75 VwGO (the Administrative Courts
Code) allows you to sue the government if they have not responded to your
application within 3 months from filing.
The Administrative Court then asks the government what is taking them so long.
And this is why it’s so important that you file a comprehensive application.
Because if the government can show that relevant information was missing or that
some of your documents weren’t translated (especially if they are in Chinese or
Amharic), they have a good reason for the delay.
If, on the other hand, the government has no good explanation – and usually they
just respond with “too much work, not enough staff, we’re working on it” -, the
court will give them a short deadline (a few months at most), in which the
government will have to make a final decision.
Does the Untätigkeitsklage really work?
Yes.
I don’t file right away after the 3 months are up. Instead, I contact your
citizenship office, telling them that I have been instructed to file a lawsuit,
but that I would really hate to cause so much trouble. I tell them that I can
keep my client at bay for one more month at most, but only if I receive the
promise that a decision will be made by then.
They usually get the hint.
And if they don’t, they surprisingly often suddenly find time to process your
application once I actually file the lawsuit. Because for the citizenship
office, dealing with the court case takes just as much work as dealing with your
application, so they might as well do the latter to avoid the former.
A few more things you need to know about the Untätigkeitsklage
As a lawsuit against the government’s inaction, the Untätigkeitsklage can
theoretically backfire. Because even if the court orders the government to
decide on your application within a certain time, the government may then issue
a negative decision, i.e. denying German citizenship.
This is why I personally do not file quickfire lawsuits just to exert pressure.
Before I do so, I want to make sure that you have met all the requirements for
obtaining German citizenship.
The other thing to keep in mind: By going to the Administrative Court, your case
file will be shifted from an overworked and understaffed government office to an
overworked and understaffed court. The case before the court will usually also
take several months, which is another reason why I would not rush to filing.
After all, you may not even be in a hurry. Or you may think that the money is
better spent on a holiday than on a lawyer. (Although this particular lawyer
really likes holidays as well.)
How much does the Untätigkeitsklage cost?
For lawyer’s and court fees, it will be around 2.000 €.
And that’s another reason why you shouldn’t file this lawsuit lightly. If you
are living a happy life and it doesn’t make any difference whether you will
receive the German passport this year or next year, then please don’t waste the
money.
If, on the other hand, you need German citizenship for a certain job or career,
or you want to run for city council or parliament in the next election, then it
may well be worth it.
My advice
To summarize it, I would reserve the Untätigkeitsklage for cases where you
haven’t heard anything for more than half a year. Especially those filing for
German citizenship from abroad are often kept waiting for several years, which I
find unacceptable.
In this case, we should threaten the filing of a lawsuit – and then follow up on
it, should it be necessary.
The Untätigkeitsklage is not restricted to citizenship law, but applies to all
interactions with the German government. For some types of visas (especially
family reunion), the German consulates sadly often operate extremely slowly. If
you find yourself in such a situation, you may want to consider hiring a lawyer
to speed up the process.
Posted in German Law, Germany, Immigration Law, Law, Politics | Tagged German
citizenship, German passport, lawyer, legal advice | 11 Comments
THE SHARING CULTURE OF GERMANY
Posted on 2024-03-27 by Andreas Moser
In Germany, people put this plastic cover over the power socket, so that friends
can’t charge their mobile phones while visiting.
And that’s all you need to know about Germany.
Posted in Germany, Technology | 31 Comments
GERMANY ON DRUGS: THE LEGALIZATION OF CANNABIS
Posted on 2024-03-20 by Andreas Moser
Zur deutschen Fassung.
Readers of this blog will surely have noticed that I am a rather conservative,
almost boring type of person. So, naturally, I have no experience whatsoever
with illegal drugs. Even the dealers usually notice this from a mile away, which
is why I am very rarely offered any of the nasty-smelling herb. (Really only
during global economic crises, as in chapter 31 of my report from Lisbon.)
I don’t even know the difference between cannabis, marijuana, hashish and weed,
and I don’t know which of them you smoke, inhale, inject or eat as cookies. In
any case, I am against it. Against all of it.
But even as a staunch opponent of drugs and as a friend of a clear mind, at some
point you have to realize that the battle is lost. After all, you can’t wage a
permanent war on drugs against your own population.
Bielefeld Police Department engaging with teenage potheads.
Also, putting people in prison for something that causes far fewer deaths than
alcohol, road traffic, vicious dogs and – ironically – the war on drugs seems
somewhat disproportionate to me. The limited and expensive capacity of the
police, prosecutors, medical experts, lawyers, courts, prison and parole
officers could probably be put to better use than chasing hashish hippies across
Hasenheide.
A drug raid in Berlin-Neukölln.
In short, not everything that smells and is annoying has to be made a criminal
offense.
And that’s exactly what the congenial German government thought. They introduced
a bill to parliament, which, after some huffing and puffing, was passed as the
Cannabis Act.
The result is, how could it be different in Germany, a carefully crafted
compromise. You will be allowed to smoke more than before, but of course not
everything, not always, not everywhere and not by everyone. In effect, we are
somewhere between Woodstock and Singapore.
Now, because I don’t use any drugs myself, I am super efficient and I can
already answer your most pressing questions about the new German cannabis law,
before you even ask them:
Possession of cannabis will be legal up to a quantity of 25 grams. Because I’ve
never tried the stuff myself, I don’t know whether that’s a lot. I am more of a
chocolate addict, and 25 grams is barely enough for half an hour.
However, this only applies to adults and only for personal use. Children and
teenagers still have to resort to beer and other alcoholic beverages. Personal
use means that you are not allowed to sell the substance, give it away or share
it. In this respect, cannabis users have it better than tobacco smokers, because
the latter find it difficult to say no when they are asked for a “have you got a
fag?” If, however, someone wants to take a puff on your joint, you can easily
say no: “Sorry, dude, but the law only allows personal use.”
Friends or couples can still go out together with a joint if they have
previously converted it into joint property. Then, but only then, they can also
consume it together. However, the weight of the joint must not exceed 25 grams,
otherwise the person carrying it would be in breach of the possession limit.
“This new cannabis law really is so much fun!”
Because the purchase and sale of cannabis are still prohibited, the question
arises as to where the stuff should come from. As befits a nation of foresters,
fairy tales and allotment gardens, Germany is relying on home-grown cannabis.
Adults with residence or habitual abode in Germany are permitted, if they have
at least one of the former for at least 6 months, to keep three cannabis plants
in their home if they keep and maintain them in a species-appropriate and
ecologically friendly manner. These three plants may be kept in addition to the
25 grams as long as they remain unharvested or the cannabis yield obtained from
the harvest does not exceed a further 25 grams. The good old three-field system
of crop rotation seems like a great idea, so that the three plants are ready for
harvest at different times. However, it is important that no single plant is
ever harvested for more than 25 grams.
As these three plants apply per adult in the household (if they have been living
there for at least 6 months), couples or flat-sharing communities can of course
grow more plants, whereby it is important to clearly assign each plant to a
specific person.
As the photo insinuates, I assume that many people will soon be thinking of
their previously neglected grandparents and other distant relatives: “Grandma,
you always had such a green thumb! Can I put these plants in your house?” For
me, these unexpected social side effects are always the most exciting aspects
about new legislation.
If there are children or teenagers in the house, the plants must be kept in
rooms to which the little rascals have no access. However, because the
regulations on species-appropriate plant care require that the plants are
exposed to sunlight and therefore face south, south-east or south-west with a
window (to be cleaned every two months), in practice, especially in small
apartments, you will often have to make a choice: Kids or weed. I predict a
decline in the birth rate.
It also becomes tricky when a parent dies. Because then, the partner and the
children usually are the heirs. According to the principle of universal
succession, the inheritance is transferred directly to the heirs at the time of
death, without any further legal act and without the need for consent. And,
poof, the children are the owners of a drug plantation. The problem is minor for
children under the age of 14, as they are still exempt from criminal
culpability. But teenagers will already have one foot in jail.
You also need to be careful when moving house: As you are not allowed to carry
more than 25 grams of cannabis in public, you can hardly move with three
flowering plants at the same time. But you are also not allowed to give them
away, because that would not be personal consumption. So you have to move
gradually or destroy the plants. (I only know this from other plants, but as far
as I have tried, you can destroy them by not watering them for several weeks.)
Now, of course, everyone wants to know: Where can you get the seeds or cuttings
to grow your own weed? You can either order them, even via the internet, but
only from EU member states. Alternatively, even if you are not a member, you can
go to a so-called growers’ association and purchase up to seven cannabis seeds
or up to five cuttings, but no more than five seeds and/or cuttings in total, of
which no more than three may mature into fully-fledged plants.
And that brings us to the growers’ associations. This is a form of agricultural
cooperative, which, at least for the East Germans among us, brings back fond
memories of collective farming. I think the word “Anbauvereinigung” is a
wonderful one, but I guess in popular parlance, people will refer to them as
cannabis clubs.
So far, the rules that I outlined have been fairly relaxed and liberal, almost
anarchic. But with cannabis clubs, the law on associations comes into play, and
that’s where the buck stops and the fun ends. Growers’ associations may only be
run as non-commercial associations or cooperatives, must be registered and
require official permission to grow cannabis. The associations may have a
maximum of 500 members, all of whom must be of legal age and have been residents
in Germany for at least 6 months. They may only supply the cannabis to their
members, who must also take over the cultivation themselves and personally, but
collectively.
Founding meeting of a growers’ association.
Each member may obtain no more than 25 grams of cannabis per day and no more
than 50 grams per month from this collective cultivation. Members between the
ages of 18 and 21 may only obtain 30 grams per month, but only up to a THC
content of 10%. If a member turns 18 or 21 in the course of a month, the maximum
monthly supply is adjusted in proportion to the quotient between age, number of
days in the month in question, and 30 or 50 grams, respectively. For members
whose place of birth lies more than six time zones east of the Central European
timezone, the birthday itself is not counted.
Furthermore, these clubs need a youth protection plan (although they are not
allowed to accept juvenile members), a prevention officer, only board members
with no criminal record, a fence around the plantation that is at least 2.24
meters (or 1.78 meters in Saarland) high and which obstructs the view, a
wastewater protection plan, a security plan, a supply chain officer, a
clubhouse, a flag and an embarrassing name such as “Weedmacht”, “Little Red
Riding Reever” or “Sieg High”.
Rothenburg municipal health & safety inspectors visiting a growers’ association.
The cannabis cultivation compound must be at least 200 meters away from schools,
kindergartens, playgrounds, hospitals and so on. Lost places experts like me are
currently in great demand to find suitable sites, such as old factory buildings.
I expect an enormous boom, particularly in the eastern German states, but also a
general revitalization of rural areas.
Incidentally, on the premises of the cannabis clubs, you are not allowed to
consume cannabis. That would really go to far, wouldn’t it? Also, unlike in
parliament, no alcohol may be served there.
Oh, I almost forgot the most important question: Where can you actually smoke
the 25 grams? At home, of course. But only if there are no children or teenagers
around. Nor if children or teenagers could be watching, e.g. from a neighbor’s
house, from the street or from a passing train.
However, people are allowed to smoke weed freely in public. You only have to
keep a distance of 100 meters from schools, kindergartens, playgrounds,
children’s and youth facilities, sports facilities, churches and military bases.
In pedestrian zones, smoking is only permitted from 8 pm, but then all the night
until 6:59 am.
You can use this interactive map to test your neighborhood for drug suitability.
You’ll be surprised how many kindergartens and playgrounds there are in your
neighborhood that you hadn’t even noticed before.
I have run the test for my apartment in Chemnitz. The red zones are no-go zones.
You can clearly see the advantage of living near a forest. I wouldn’t be
surprised if I soon encounter many more people on my daily walks in nature than
before.
For comparison, I also looked at the village where I grew up. The difference is
striking and illustrates the advantages of the countryside.
For people in Berlin, I assume that beautiful Müggelheim will soon become very
popular.
Keep in mind, though, that these maps work with automatically generated material
and therefore overlook many children’s and youth facilities as well as sports
facilities. You are really only safe in the great outdoors. Unless a a group of
children is passing by. Or a school bus.
In principle, all bus stops where school buses stop must be kept cannabis-free
on school days from 6:30 to 8:30 and from 12:15 to 16:30. Except during school
holidays. If school is canceled, e.g. due to flooding, the child cannabis
protection is only waived if the school cancellation was communicated at least
24 hours in advance, because otherwise it cannot be ruled out that a child did
not hear about the cancellation and will still be at the bus stop. During school
hours, cannabis consumption in the car is therefore prohibited as long as you
are driving on a route that is also frequented by school buses. Unless you have
tinted windows. In Thuringia, September 20th is World Children’s Day, which is a
smoke-free public holiday. Special rules also apply in the northern German
states whenever the wind force exceeds 6 Beaufort. The 100-meter zone is then
adapted to the direction of the wind. In westerly winds, for example, it is
shifted 20 meters per Beaufort point to the east. Vacation resorts, health
resorts, church institutions, independent public corporations, universities,
religious communities not recognized as churches, NATO military training areas,
the German Patent and Trademark Office, embassies, consulates, chambers of
trade, dyke associations, ski lifts and the Federal Waterways and Shipping
Administration may issue their own regulations, which must however (except in
the case of federal authorities or foreign, supranational and international
institutions) comply with the administrative regulations of the respective
state. In areas with elevated radon levels in the soil and in former uranium
mining areas, both of which are particularly relevant in Saxony, smoking is only
permitted from the 2nd floor upwards.
One issue has, in my opinion, not been sufficiently clarified: What happens in
the border regions if there is no prohibited facility within a radius of 100
meters in Germany, but there is a kindergarten or a playground less than 100
meters away on the Polish, Belgian or Czech side?
In effect, smoking weed will become something really bureaucratic and uncool. I
myself will stick to tobacco, where I can rely on the Supreme Court decision
BVerfGE 80, 137, which ruled that anything you do in the forest falls under the
“unhindered unfurling of one’s personality”, protected under Art. 2 para. 1 of
the German Federal Constitution.
Links:
* More reports about politics and law.
* And some of my crazy drug stories.
* As you can see, I have no idea about narcotics law. But I am happy to help
with the really important legal questions in life.
Posted in German Law, Germany, Law, Politics | Tagged criminal law, drugs | 10
Comments
DEPORTATION
Posted on 2024-03-20 by Andreas Moser
Rather somber moment, opening the e-mail from a citizenship client, and it says:
> I have also attached the transportation records for my
> great-great-grandfather’s 1941 deportation from Hamburg to Lodz and his 1942
> death record.
That really puts into perspective some of my other cases.
Posted in German Law, Germany, History, Holocaust, Law, Poland | Tagged
citizenship, German citizenship, Lodz | 2 Comments
A DIVORCE BETWEEN THE PEAKS OF THE BALKANS
Posted on 2024-03-17 by Andreas Moser
Zur deutschen Fassung.
The client wants a divorce.
She has been separated for more than 15 years. Back then, the husband
disappeared. No contact ever since. “Somewhere in the Balkans,” she says,
“Kosovo, Montenegro, around there. He is making damn sure that ain’t nobody ever
gonna find him.”
Also, she says, he is highly dangerous. Something about smuggling and weapons
and gang warfare. With plenty of bodies buried in the Balkan forests.
Obviously, the case appeals to me.
I already see myself climbing the peaks of the Durmitor mountain range and
swimming through Tara Canyon. Getting the backpack ready, I am looking forward
to weeks of drudging myself from village to village, asking around for Mister
….. and on the lookout for hajduk henchmen.
But I am still a professional lawyer, so first I need to carry out some due
diligence. I have to run an internet search for the disappeared husband.
After a few minutes, I have found him. I send him a message, he calls back right
away. It’s a rather pleasant conversation. Of course he agrees to the divorce,
no problem at all.
Almost disappointing that the case got resolved so easily.
Also, I really would have loved to see the face of the Family Court in Germany,
had I handed in my invoice for three weeks of criss-crossing the peaks of the
Balkans.
Links:
* More of that dry legal stuff, particularly about family law.
* More stories from Yugoslavia.
* And, if you ever got an interesting case requiring weeks of international
travel, this is my little law firm.
Posted in Family Law, Law, Montenegro, Travel | Tagged divorce, Kosovo,
Yugoslavia | 8 Comments
LAWYERS AS PEACEMAKERS
Posted on 2024-02-04 by Andreas Moser
Some might be surprised to hear this, but as a lawyer, my main goal is to bring
peace into the world. This is how I do it:
– Client calls and wants to sue everyone preemptively and proactively, to
litigate left right and center, and to file more motions than there are birds in
the sky.
– I send her my fee agreement and ask for payment of retainer.
– The next morning, client calls: “You know, I have thought about it. I don’t
think it’s really necessary to do anything right now.”
And there it is, another family feud avoided.
Posted in Law | Tagged lawyer, legal advice | 6 Comments
THE NEW GERMAN CITIZENSHIP LAW OF 2024
Posted on 2024-01-19 by Andreas Moser
Long awaited, the day has finally come: The German parliament has passed
substantial amendments to the Citizenship Act, which will – in many cases – make
naturalization in Germany easier. In essence, the residency requirement will be
shortened to 5 years, and Germany will no longer object to foreigners
maintaining their original citizenship. Dual citizenship will no longer pose any
problem.
But before we get into the details – and before everybody who is interested in
German citizenship becomes too excited -, I have to put things into context:
There are basically three paths to German citizenship.
The most common way is by descent. If you have at least one German ancestor, you
may already be a German citizen, without ever having realized it. Because there
were several waves of mass emigration from Germany throughout history, there are
millions of descendants around the world. Theoretically, there is no limit on
how far back you can go in your family tree. In practice, if it’s more than
three or four generations, it becomes rather tricky.
On citizenship by descent, I have a separate article. This path is not affected
by the changes enacted now.
The second way is restitution. This concerns a whole number of different cases,
in which your ancestors lost German citizenship, but you can now reclaim it. I
also have a separate article on this rather complex issue. Again, these cases
are not affected by the new law.
The third path is naturalization. This means that you immigrate to Germany, live
and work there for several years, learn the language, pass the citizenship test,
and pledge allegiance to the king. No wait, we’re actually a republic now.
As a citizenship lawyer, I deal with those cases the least, because they are
usually straightforward. The main problems that require a lawyer in
naturalization cases are prior criminal convictions, past or present use of the
welfare system, and – until now – getting an exemption that allows you to hold
on to your first passport.
Only naturalization is affected by the changes that will come into effect in
June 2024. If you have previously looked into German citizenship by descent or
by restitution, and the result was negative, you can stop reading. (Unless, and
I am sorry that things are a bit complicated, you received a negative reply
before the changes of 2021 were enacted. In this case, you actually should look
into your situation very carefully. Or hire a hot-shot lawyer to do so.)
So now, let’s get to the point: What are the changes to German citizenship law?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dual citizenship:
The most important change, clearly, is that Germany no longer objects to dual
citizenship.
The principle already had many holes, and more and more citizens held dual or
indeed multiple citizenship. Because country A can only legislate the
citizenship of country A, but not those of countries B through Z, and because
you often obtain citizenship without knowing it (particularly at birth),
multiple citizenship is pretty much inevitable in many cases.
The insistence that you can only be loyal to one country was weird from the
beginning, long outdated by now, and complicated to maintain. Thankfully, it has
been given up completely. Henceforth, you will receive German citizenship
regardless of what you decide to do with your existing citizenship. (You can
still give it up if you want to – and if your home country permits you to do
so.)
Interestingly, and often overlooked, this change also makes it much easier for
Germans to take on a second citizenship. Because until now, we needed to obtain
prior permission, lest we would have forfeited German citizenship (§ 25 StAG).
Without knowing it, this has happened to hundreds of thousands of Germans living
abroad. Trying to reclaim previously held German citizenship, either directly or
by descendants, is a large bulk of my work.
For me personally, this opens up enticing possibilities. Especially as I have
lived in a few countries already to which I feel a much closer emotional
connection than to my native Germany. I just hope that the stint as an illegal
immigrant in Bolivia won’t shatter the dream of living out my life by Lake
Titicaca.
And remember: The new law only enters into effect in June 2024. (27 June 2024 to
be exact, three months after publication in the Bundesgesetzblatt.) So don’t go
rushing and applying for another citizenship just yet, or you will still forfeit
German citizenship.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Residence between 3 and 5 years:
Due to many exceptions, the ban on dual citizenship really didn’t accept that
many applicants. But another change will affect almost everyone: The residency
requirement for naturalization in Germany has been reduced considerably.
Hitherto, the standard requirement for naturalization was 8 years, although
there were several ways to shorten this period. The new standard requirement
will be 5 years (§ 10 I 1 StAG).
And these 5 years can be reduced to anything between 3 and 5 years in cases of
exceptional integration, as measured by language skills (German at the C1 level,
§ 10 III no. 3 StAG), school, education and work experience, as well as civic
engagement (§ 10 III no. 1 StAG).
To answer one of the questions I receive most often: If your German is not at
the C1 level, there is no chance. That is the minimum requirement, on top of
which you need to have done outstanding academic or professional work, run for
city council (if you are an EU citizen), volunteered in environmental, social or
political groups, organized arts exhibitions, volunteered as a firefighter, and
published a book about Germany. As a general rule, if you haven’t been on
television or radio, then your achievements probably don’t count as exceptional.
The new law holds on to § 12b StAG, one of my favorite sections of the German
Citizenship Act, which means that you don’t have to physically remain in Germany
for the whole time of the required residence. It even allows you to combine
several stays. I have had plenty of clients who were surprised to learn that
they already meet the residency requirement, because the time they spent in
Germany as a student a decade ago counts. (Holidays don’t count, sorry.)
The new law also holds on to § 9 StAG, according to which spouses of German
citizens will usually receive German citizenship after living in Germany for 3
years.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
German citizenship for children of foreign parents:
Germany does not generally have ius soli, whereby you receive the citizenship of
the country in which you happen to be born. (Most countries in the Americas
operate like this.)
But there is an exception for children born in Germany to two foreign parents,
if at least one parent has been residing legally in Germany for 5 years (§ 4 III
1 no. 1 StAG). These children will receive German citizenship at birth.
Obviously, these children will also receive their parents’ citizenship (based on
the respective laws of that country or those countries) and will thus have dual
or multiple citizenship. These children will no longer have to decide for only
one citizenship at age 21 (as used to be case until now, § 29 I 2 StAG).
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Adoption:
The rule that a foreign child adopted by German parents receives German
citizenship by virtue of the adoption (§ 6 StAG) will remain unchanged.
But the rule that a German child adopted by foreign parents loses German
citizenship (§ 27 StAG) will be removed. German children adopted by foreign
parents will now keep their German citizenship. Whether they will receive their
adoptive parents’ citizenship depends on the citizenship law of that country, of
course.
This sounds like an arcane provision of the Citizenship Act, but it is relevant
in a surprising number of cases. Especially in cases of descent, we often
discover that a German child was adopted. Either because his/her parents were
dead or lost, as was often the case after World War II, or – more relevant in
recent years – because of adoptions in patchwork families.
A typical case goes like this: German mother with German child falls in love
with a foreigner and they want to move to his home country. To speed up
immigration, they get married and the father adopts the child. Although nobody
intends to do so, the child may lose German citizenship. Because the mother
doesn’t lose German citizenship, she thinks that her son still is German as
well. Decades or generations later, they discover the error. Very tricky cases,
especially as there are different types of adoptions, several exceptions to the
rule, and oddly enough, many people who think they were adopted never were (in
the formal legal sense).
Now, with § 27 StAG gone, you have one less thing to worry about. But then, if
you have children, you always got plenty of other things to worry about.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Language requirement:
The general language requirement for naturalization in Germany is the B1 exam (§
10 IV 1 StAG).
This is an easy intermediate level, which enables you to hold everyday
conversations, read simple newspaper articles and write e-mails or letters. If
anyone still writes letters. The Goethe Institute has sample exams for all
language levels, so you can test yourself. Keep in mind that you don’t need to
ace the test. You just need to pass it.
There is a short list of exceptions of people who do not need to pass the B1
exam:
* Children under the age of 16 only need to show “age-adequate” level of German
(§ 10 IV 2 StAG).
* Foreign workers (the so-called “Gastarbeiter” or “Vertragsarbeitnehmer”) who
came to West Germany before 1974 or to East Germany before 1990 only need to
prove oral knowledge of German. They do not need to pass a written exam (§ 10
IV 3 StAG). They also do not need to pass the citizenship test (§ 10 VI 2
StAG). The idea is to finally naturalize the people who came to Germany to
rebuild the country after World War II, who have been living here for
decades, and who have mostly been working in manual jobs, without any access
to formal higher education.
* Lastly, all applicants who simply cannot manage to pass the B1 exam, although
they have tried to do so repeatedly and seriously. In this case, the
applicant only needs to show sufficient oral knowledge of German to get by in
everyday life (§ 10 IVa StAG). This concerns people with severe physical or
mental handicaps, but not illiterates, as illiteracy can be overcome.
I am a bit worried about this latest point, because I already receive far too
many e-mails in which people ask me to file for an exemption from the language
requirement. Suddenly, everyone wants to be dyslexic. But if you graduated from
high school or have a university degree, you can also learn a foreign language.
In any case, you have to attend a language course first and attempt to pass the
exam (several times if necessary), before you can even think about using the
“I’m too stupid”-excuse.
Your time is probably better spent if you simply learn a bit of German. It’s not
hard, after all, and a very poetic and romantic language.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Financial requirements:
Germany has no minimum income requirement for naturalization, but you need to
show that you can support yourself and your dependents without access to
welfare. You must not be collecting either “Bürgergeld” or “Sozialhilfe”. All
other public subsidies (e.g. the student support “BAföG” or the housing benefit
“Wohngeld”), unemployment benefits based on your previous contributions
(“Arbeitslosengeld”), or of course a pension do not pose any problem.
Thus far, § 10 I 1 no. 3 StAG included an exception for applicants who were on
welfare “for no fault of their own”. This was a beautifully vague term, under
which I could argue many different cases. Apparently, I went too far with that,
because the new law restricts the exception to a few specific narrow cases:
* Only the same group of foreign contract workers mentioned above (cf. the
language requirement) can still claim the general exception of being on
welfare “for no fault of their own” (§ 10 I 1 no. 3 (a) StAG).
* Another exception from the no-welfare requirement applies if you are in
full-time employment and have been in full-time employment for at least 20 of
the past 24 months (§ 10 I 1 no. 3 (b) StAG). This concerns the so-called
“working poor” who so graciously provide the basis for capitalism and rising
stock prices.
* Spouses of a “working poor”, if they have a minor child (§ 10 I 1 no. 3 (c)
StAG).
This part of the new law is much harsher than the old rules. People with
disabilities or depression, single parents, people who are taking care of an
elderly or sick family member, and similar groups will have a much harder time
to apply for naturalization. They are left with the application pursuant to § 8
II StAG, which is a discretionary naturalization. Paradoxically, these are the
kind of cases which will probably require the help of a lawyer, although it
concerns exactly the folks who don’t have much money. (Not that I want to imply
that lawyers are expensive.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Political requirements:
The new Citizenship Act is much more political than the previous one.
While people who were actively fighting against basic liberal and democratic
values (§ 11 s. 1 no. 1 StAG) or terrorists (§ 11 s. 1 no. 2 StAG in connection
with § 54 II no. 2 or 4 AufenthG) were already excluded from naturalization, the
new Citizenship Act of 2024 includes a whole number of points which prevent
naturalization, even when all other conditions are met.
From now on, foreigners who are married with several spouses simultaneously will
be barred from naturalization (§ 11 s. 11 no. 3 (a) StAG).
As an expert on international family law, I can already see plenty of
problematic cases. Because it happens more often than not that people “forget”
to get a divorce before entering into a second marriage in another country.
Sometimes, they have lost contact with their first spouse, sometimes they want
to save the money for lawyers (never a good idea), sometimes they think it
doesn’t matter. Whenever I tell people in that situation that it will come back
to haunt them later, they don’t believe me. Well, now you have one more example
how that nonchalance will ruin your life.
And Germany won’t naturalize any more machos. The new § 11 s. 1 no. 3 (b) StAG
stipulates that naturalization is not an option if the applicant demonstrates
through his (or her) behavior that he (or she) disrespects the equal treatment
of men and women.
Wow. Honestly, if this was strictly applied, it would cover a large number of
applicants, both men and women. After all, it’s not only toxic masculinity which
poses a threat to equality, but also subservient anti-feminism. Let’s just put
it this way, from the practical perspective of legal advice: If you are thinking
about ever applying for German citizenship, stop making silly jokes based on
gender stereotypes. Don’t be sexist. Don’t treat women as pretty objects. Don’t
expect men to pay the bill on the first date. Don’t change your last name, just
because you got married to some dude. Don’t ask your boyfriend to kill the
spider if it’s on your side of the bed.
In any case, if this clause will be applied in practice at all, it will lead to
the most interesting court cases.
The term “basic liberal and democratic values”, which as a core concept of
German law is less vague than it sounds, will now have some of its elements
spelled out explicitly. § 10 I 3 StAG will specify that “actions motivated by
antisemitism, by racism or by other dehumanizing tendencies” violate the German
constitution and the basic liberal and democratic values enshrined therein.
Again, this is a very wide clause, as it speaks of “actions”, not of criminal
acts, let alone convictions. Those were already a problem before. Now, the
immigration authority can check your Facebook feed for racist crap, antisemitic
tropes or if you ever belittled victims of a genocide. They will also receive
information from other government agencies, especially the prosecutor’s office
and the intelligence services.
As opposed to the anti-machismo clause, I expect this section of the new law to
be applied very strictly. I also expect this to lead to plenty of litigation,
which could be good news for me as a lawyer. Problem is, I don’t like to work
with racists or antisemites.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Revocation:
I suspect that these political aspects will be responsible for the bulk of
attempts to revoke German citizenship. Because according to § 35 StAG, Germany
can revoke citizenship within 10 years after naturalization if it turns out that
the applicant provided false information.
So far, this revocation was already permissible even when the individual was
rendered stateless by it (§ 35 II StAG). In the future, when most naturalized
German citizens will retain their primary citizenship, statelessness is no
longer a problem, which makes revocation even easier.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ceremony:
Lastly, the new § 16 s. 3 StAG stipulates that there shall be a big party when
you receive German citizenship.
Can’t nobody argue with that!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As I said, if you have a straightforward case, you don’t need a lawyer. But if
you have a complicated situation, especially based on descent or restitution, or
problems regarding the qualification of previous stays in Germany, questions as
to whether you have been a resident at all, if you meet the “exceptional
integration” criteria, or similar stuff, feel free to contact me for a
consultation.
And please share the blog with anyone whom you think this information will help.
Thank you!
Posted in German Law, Germany, Immigration Law, Law | Tagged German citizenship,
German passport, legal advice, passport | 47 Comments
HOW TO SPOT CLIENTS WHO WON’T PAY
Posted on 2024-01-15 by Andreas Moser
Over time, most professionals become pretty good at spotting clients who ain’t
gonna pay.
Some of these red flags are:
* clients who send the same e-mail to at least a dozen different lawyers
* or, even worse, those who additionally send the same e-mail to the United
Nations, Interpol and CNN
* people who contact you with “only a quick question”
* those who start their call or message by explaining that they don’t really
need a lawyer, because they have already done all the research themselves and
the law is, of course, obviously on their side
* those who explain that the whole system is rotten, that lawyers are part of
it, and that it’s 1930s Germany all over again
* those who ask a question “for a good friend”
* rambling requests sent at 2 o’clock in the morning
* people who mention how wealthy and/or important they are
* messages that feign urgency, when there is none
* clients who point out that “my case will make you famous”
But the funniest thing is when somebody writes an e-mail, in which they
explicitly state that they do want to pay for your services, but you know they
won’t.
Here is an example from last week, after I had replied to the initial e-mail
with a quote for a very modest consultation fee. I had even deviated from my
standard fee, because it wasn’t exactly a very complicated case. Except for the
complicated client, perhaps.
> Dear Andreas,
> I must express my surprise at the apparent tone of your message. While I
> understand the importance of your expertise and the value of legal advice, the
> juxtaposition of your statement that my question is a “very typical one” and
> the subsequent request for payment seems contradictory.
It’s funny when people who aren’t lawyers try to sound like one, but it ends up
reading like convoluted nonsense.
> Your initial assertion, “As your question is a very typical one, I don’t need
> to charge my full consultation fee,” led me to believe that my inquiry fell
> within the scope of routine queries you encounter.
It did. But you also gotta pay for routine haircuts, routine pizzas and even for
routine heart surgery.
> I want to assure you that my intention was never to seek a free service. I am
> more than willing to compensate for your time and expertise, as I understand
> the value of professional guidance.
It probably took you longer to verbosely “assure your intention” and
“willingness to compensate” than a simple bank/Paypal transfer would have taken.
> However, the accusatory note in your message implies an assumption that I am
> fishing for free advice, which is not conducive to establishing a professional
> and collaborative relationship.
Oh gosh, now it descends into the tone of those bland and boring business
websites. I understand that, in order to make a living, we sometimes need to do
things which are not particularly honorable. But when people think that human
beings really talk like this, it makes me more sad than an orphanage full of
children from Chernobyl, each of them with several tumors, gnawing away at their
innocent little brains.
> I am genuinely seeking assistance and guidance in navigating the complexities
> surrounding German citizenship, and I am more than willing to honor your fee
> structure.
When people say that they will “honor” something, you know they won’t. People
who “honor” someone else’s territorial integrity, for example, usually invade
their next-door neighbor soon thereafter.
Also, I don’t really have nothing as fancy as a “fee structure“.
> If there is any misunderstanding or clarification needed on my part, please
> let me know. I believe a transparent and open communication style is key to
> fostering a positive working relationship.
Actually, without no payment, there ain’t gonna be no “positive working
relationship” that can’t be “fostered”.
> Thank you for your understanding, and I look forward to the opportunity to
> engage in a mutually beneficial professional exchange in the future.
“I would prefer not to,” as Bartleby said. And he worked at a law office, so he
should know.
Links:
* More legal stuff.
* Some thoughts on lawyer’s fees.
Posted in Law | Tagged business, lawyer, legal advice, money | 15 Comments
← Older posts
* Donation
If you find this blog funny, clever or even useful, you can keep it alive
with a small donation. Thank you!
$10.00
* RECENT POSTS
* Two Lessons from the last Bilderberg Conference
* Time Management: “No thanks!”
* How to speed up your application for German citizenship
* The Sharing Culture of Germany
* Germany on Drugs: The Legalization of Cannabis
* Deportation
* A Divorce between the Peaks of the Balkans
* Lawyers as Peacemakers
* The new German Citizenship Law of 2024
* How to spot clients who won’t pay
* FOLLOW BLOG VIA E-MAIL
Enter your e-mail address to follow this blog and receive new posts by
e-mail. It\'s free!
Email Address:
Follow
Join 8,804 other subscribers
* CATEGORIES
* Abkhazia (6)
* Afghanistan (20)
* Albania (16)
* Antigua (2)
* Argentina (3)
* Armenia (9)
* Austria (18)
* Azerbaijan (8)
* Belarus (6)
* Belgium (12)
* Bolivia (118)
* Books (136)
* Bosnia–Herzegovina (1)
* Brazil (49)
* Canada (28)
* Chile (28)
* Easter Island (15)
* China (22)
* Cinema (134)
* Colombia (14)
* Croatia (3)
* Cuba (8)
* Czech Republic (10)
* Denmark (1)
* Economics (136)
* Ecuador (5)
* Egypt (12)
* Estonia (13)
* Europe (58)
* Finland (5)
* Food (52)
* France (23)
* Georgia (13)
* Germany (212)
* Greece (12)
* History (267)
* Cold War (26)
* Holocaust (42)
* World War I (13)
* World War II (62)
* Human Rights (82)
* Hungary (25)
* India (7)
* Iran (54)
* Israel (51)
* Italy (150)
* Apulia (25)
* Basilicata (1)
* Sardinia (12)
* Sicily (62)
* South Tyrol (1)
* Jordan (2)
* Language (99)
* Laos (1)
* Latvia (15)
* Law (172)
* Family Law (29)
* German Law (47)
* Immigration Law (30)
* Libya (7)
* Life (124)
* Lithuania (65)
* Love (43)
* Macedonia (16)
* Malaysia (1)
* Malta (38)
* Mexico (10)
* Military (114)
* Moldova (5)
* Montenegro (64)
* Morocco (2)
* Music (34)
* North Korea (13)
* Norway (3)
* Panama (3)
* Peru (29)
* Philosophy (89)
* Photography (680)
* Poland (21)
* Politics (380)
* Portugal (29)
* Azores (18)
* Madeira (5)
* Religion (120)
* Islam (38)
* Romania (143)
* Russia (40)
* Saudi Arabia (9)
* Serbia (20)
* Singapore (1)
* Sint Maarten (2)
* Slovakia (9)
* Spain (57)
* Andalusia (42)
* Gran Canaria (3)
* Sports (67)
* Suriname (1)
* Sweden (10)
* Switzerland (3)
* Syria (27)
* Technology (113)
* Terrorism (45)
* Thailand (1)
* Time (29)
* Transnistria (9)
* Travel (904)
* UK (132)
* Jersey (1)
* London (25)
* Sark (4)
* Scotland (14)
* Ukraine (55)
* Uncategorized (5)
* USA (181)
* Venezuela (5)
* Video Blog (65)
* Vietnam (1)
*
The Happy Hermit
Blog at WordPress.com.
The Happy Hermit
Blog at WordPress.com.
* Subscribe Subscribed
* The Happy Hermit
Join 3,392 other subscribers
Sign me up
* Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
* Privacy
* * The Happy Hermit
* Customize
* Subscribe Subscribed
* Sign up
* Log in
* Report this content
* View site in Reader
* Manage subscriptions
* Collapse this bar
Loading Comments...
Write a Comment...
Email Name Website